Talk:Share Your Soles

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 18 February 2019 and 12 May 2019. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Marsh5668, Gabbyxkay, Nataliej929.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 03:31, 18 January 2022 (UTC)

TTrriisshaa's Peer Review
Share Your Soles is structured in a way that is easy to read/understand. Based on the table of contents and information cube at the beginning, someone can easily navigate their way around the article.

However, there are somethings Share Your Soles could improve on like
 * The lead should be as specific as possible. For instance, the first sentence it states that Share Your Soles helps homeless and individuals who cannot afford shoes. Who are those individuals or homeless? Their background? The reader should know what Share Your Soles is about and who their audience is based on the lead.
 * The history section should work like a timeline meaning try including the dates of when organizations or locations opened (Ex: the drop-off locations in Chicago)
 * Somethings are very redundant or over explained (Ex: there’s a section for contributors and volunteers/contributors… maybe put those two sections together that way your article doesn’t feel repetitive).
 * less essay/storytelling format (Avoid the phrase "As a result")
 * Be careful with Grammar (Proper pronouns, run-on sentences, commas etc)
 * Use past tense and third person
 * Be careful with using sources that are sponsoring Share Your Soles because they are not reliable (Ex. Pr web)
 * Also, there are multiple sources being cited several times within the same section

Overall, Share Your Soles is well structured outline which makes it easy to navigate and find information. What your group should focus on is the language of the article making sure it does not sound like an essay or argue for the organization. Also, I suggest looking at these two links to help improve the article. They help avoid the essay like format without creating vagueness in the article which is something I will also use for my organization article.

TTrriisshaa (talk) 14:45, 3 April 2019 (UTC)

Michaelas Peer review
Overall, I think your group has a great article started. I remember at the beginning of the semester you guys were a little unsure about Share your souls and if you would have enough info but from what I see, you guys have a good amount! The article is easy for readers to navigate and not confusing at all.

The lead: is in general pretty good and very easy to understand. Maybe add some more info about who their organization really targets. "this organization is used multiple times in the lead which I don't think is needed.

History: I think the information given in this section is great. The only critique I have about this section is try and make it sounds a little less like an essay. Words like "from there" and "as a result" make the section sound like you are writing an essay.

Mission statement: The last part of the section seems kind of out of place but other than that I think this section is fine.

Contributions/Volunteers: -I think you could possibly combine the contributions and the volunteers/contributors section if your group wants to. Other than that, I think this section is overall pretty strong and I thought it was cool how individual people were listed and not just large corporations. Also, if there is only one source for a whole section I believe you only have to site it once.

Fundraisers: Run with purpose sound kind of like a Press release especially the part that says the secretary of state attended. Maybe just switch some words around to make it sound more factual. Overall a good section just focus on making the sections more factual. Awards and Recognition: I don't really see any issues here.

Overall a great first draft. Needs some grammatical fixes and some edits!

Msmit70 (talk) 01:35, 4 April 2019 (UTC)

Peer Review
Strong lead and mission statement! They’re straight to the point, no flowery language and is easy to comprehend. The article is very well organized and has a good amount of information being provided. There is a great number of references that are notable. I like the section at the beginning of the article that gives quick information like founder year, who the founder is, and so on. The infobox is a nice touch.


 * The history section is written very well but it does sound a little PRish.
 * The last sentence in "Flint, Michigan Contribution" was a bit unclear.
 * I would suggest to not use the same citation after every sentence in a section by rather put it at the end of the whole paragraph and try not to reuse the same citation.
 * Beware of essay-like speech. I found that sections like “Allison Grady” and “Illinois Bone and Joint Institute” read like an essay.
 * In the section “Illinois Bone and Joint Institute” try not to use language like “as a result”.
 * 20th Anniversary of Share Your Soles needs a link.

Here are some sources that could be useful. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/giving-heart-and-sole-to-haitian-children/ https://patch.com/illinois/oakpark/hatch-green-team-collects-154-pairs-shoes-share-your-soles https://www.guideposts.org/inspiration/people-helping-people/share-your-soles http://chronicleillinois.com/news/cook-county-news/share-your-soles-shoe-project-ties-woman-to-world/ https://www.michigan.gov/mdhhs/0,5885,7-339-71551_69890_69993-342840--,00.html

RoseChampagne (talk) 22:09, 7 April 2019 (UTC)

Ekarns2 Peer Review
I think your group did a great job at explaining what "Share Your Soles" is as well as providing the reader with a great amount of information. You guys also did a pretty good job at staying neutral, like a wikipedia page should do. Great work, lots of information, but you keep it short and to the point, some sections would be good with more information though!

·History: If you guys have the information, maybe put what kind of families or neighborhoods these shoes are going to, just to be more descriptive. You guys also could have more of a timeline so that the reader gets a better understanding on the company and when it was developed. When did she take the trip? When did she create this company?

·Mission statement: Maybe go into depth about what kind of programs they have developed and talk about those. ·Contributions: In my opinion, I think that you could combine the contributions section and the contributors section together.

·Volunteers/Contributors: I think this section is really good. You were descriptive and provided good information.

·Fundraisers: Overall, this section is pretty good, but try not to sound to "PR" in some sections. Remember this page is to strictly provide readers with information.

·Awards: Maybe go more into depth about these awards, and why they are honorable awards to win.

Some changes I suggest would be to go more into depth in some sections so the reader gets a better understanding on "Share Your Soles". I also would suggest not to sound to PR like or essay like, make sure you guys are watching that. I think those changes would be an improvement, because like I said before, the point of this is to provided information and stay unbiased. Otherwise I think this draft is looking great.

Ekarns2 (talk) 01:56, 8 April 2019 (UTC) Emily Karns Ekarns2 (talk) 02:00, 8 April 2019 (UTC) Emily Karns

Peer Review
Hey! Your article is really good! I made a couple of minor edits and have one suggestion.

helpful. https://www.ibji.com/share-your-soles-for-haiti/
 * Add more info on Haiti, maybe even add a whole section about your orgs contributions to Haiti. Here is one that I thought would be

Best! RoseChampagne (talk) 15:47, 24 April 2019 (UTC)

A Commons file used on this page has been nominated for speedy deletion
The following Wikimedia Commons file used on this page has been nominated for speedy deletion: You can see the reason for deletion at the file description page linked above. —Community Tech bot (talk) 15:51, 29 April 2019 (UTC)
 * SYS logo150px.png