Talk:Shriya Pilgaonkar/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Vivvt (talk · contribs) 07:10, 20 May 2016 (UTC)

I will start with the review soon. - Vivvt ( Talk ) 07:10, 20 May 2016 (UTC)


 * Images
 * The infobox image is tagged for the copyright violation at Commons.


 * Sources
 * Main concern for the article is that it has mostly non-reliable sources as per the wiki standards. These needs to be replaced before I move ahead for the review.
 * Marathi.tv
 * Telechakkar.com
 * Bollypedia.in
 * Homegrown.co.in
 * Traileraddict.com
 * The filmography section is completely unsourced.

I would proceed once these issues are addressed. - Vivvt ( Talk ) 06:56, 21 May 2016 (UTC)
 * Issues solved. Mr. Smart ℒION  ⋠☎️✍⋡ 04:27, 22 May 2016 (UTC)


 * Facebook, YouTube, and IMDB are not RS. Please replace. ✅ I've removed the sources as well as the information. There is no reliable source of those information.
 * External link to Wiki Commons does not exist. ✅
 * Filmography table
 * spelling mistake for Documentary ✅
 * Role details are missing ❌ 2 couldn't be filled


 * "Hindi films of Bollywood" This is incorrect. Bollywood is for Hindi films only ✅
 * "Marathi, and French language films" I see only one film per language in the filmography section. Why plural then? ✅
 * "Her father is actor, director, producer Sachin Pilgaonkar, Her mother, Supriya Pilgaonkar, is also an actress." Please rephrase. ✅
 * "...then she did some short courses in film at...". The word "some" not needed. ✅
 * "Shriya first appeared on screen in serial “Tu Tu Main Main”. Mention language ✅
 * "Shriya debated in 2013 Marathi film Ekulti Ek Written, directed and produced by her father." correct "debated" and lower-case for "Written" ✅
 * "The film is an adaption of English movie" Which one? ❌ But I've corrected the phrase
 * "The film is an adaption of English movie with a father-daughter story as the central theme, she ended up sharing screen space with both her parents.". Please rephrase. ✅
 * "At the 51st Maharashtra State Film Awards, Shriya was found to be the most promising female newcomer and won the Best Debut Actress award." Please rephrase. ❌ The phrase seems correct
 * Avoid referring by the first name. ❌ Not understood. Then what Pilgaonkar?
 * "In the film, she plays the role of Swara." should be placed elsewhere. does not flow correctly. ✅
 * "She also made her Bollywood debut in 2016 Yash Raj Films released FAN written and directed by Maneesh Sharma and produced by Aditya Chopra where she share a screen opposite Shah Rukh Khan." a long sentence which is grammatically incorrect. ✅
 * Above statement also has disambiguation for FAN. ✅
 * Italics should be used for the films wherever possible. ✅
 * The publication date should be mentioned for all the references. ✅
 * It has a category "Indian female models". What modelling work has she done? No mention of this in the article. ✅
 * The article has lots of grammatical mistakes. It needs help from WP:GOCE. ✅
 * Need reviews of her work; acting, direction, production. The article is incomplete without that. ❌ One review is there about the review of her film Ekulti Ek.
 * In my opinion and per Good article criteria 1 and 3, I dont think article is fit to be a good article as this point of time. It needs major work. ❌ What major work? - Vivvt ( Talk ) 09:18, 23 May 2016 (UTC)

I've resolved all the above mentioned issues (except 3-5). Mr. Smart ℒION ⋠☎️✍⋡ 16:08, 23 May 2016 (UTC)
 * She has done only three films out of which two had her in the minor roles. There are no reviews of her works from any aspect; acting, direction, production, modelling. I dont think this meets the criteria for the broad coverage. I would fail this article on that note unless its substantially expanded to cover all the concerned points. - Vivvt ( Talk ) 09:21, 24 May 2016 (UTC)
 * I've now expanded the article as much as I could expand. I've also added reviews of her acting in Ekulti Ek and Fan. Moreover, some of her stage performance reviews have also been added in the article with reliable sources. Mr. Smart ℒION  ⋠☎️✍⋡ 09:30, 25 May 2016 (UTC)


 * Following sentences are not encyclopaedic:
 * "During this play, she had realised her true love for the stage" ✅
 * "After showing stellar performance in Freedom of Love" ✅
 * "The film is based on the unique relation of a father – daughter." ✅
 * "After acting and receiving overwhelming response from the audience from Ekulti Ek she was one again beckoned" ✅
 * "After showing stellar performances in Internal Affairs and Common People" ✅
 * "The year 2015 proved very lucky to her as she was paired opposite Bollywood's biggest 50-year-old actor superstar (Shah Rukh Khan) for the first time but she was not nervous as five years ago, the actress had a chance to meet with him while working on a short film and the ice was broken." OMG!! ✅
 * "When the film was released worldwide, she was overwhelmed that the audience has stood up and took notice of her acting in the film." ✅
 * "Her film industry debut made her to win six awards." What are those? ❌ The sources have not mentioned the awards. At least, let the people know that she has won six awards. And one award has been already mentioned.

The nominator should understand that we are not writing fan pages here. The content should be encyclopaedic. I am afraid the way this whole article is shaping into a fan page. I would suggest withdrawal of the nomination. - Vivvt ( Talk ) 09:49, 25 May 2016 (UTC)
 * "It's very interesting to know that she was shooting for both he films Fan and Un plus une at the same time." What so interesting? ✅
 * "After making debut in Marathi, Hindi and French films, she quips that she doesn't know which language she will now make her next debut in, but she says that she wants to continue and concentrate on directing short films." Its not her interview page. Please rephrase and add only necessary part. ✅
 * "Shriya has also been modelled in a few ads and is also known in the advertisement world." Which brands? ❌ The sources have not mentioned the brands. I think it shouldn't have any major problem. A least, let people know that she appeared in some ad.
 * Why "Early life" and "Personal life" sections are not merged? ✅
 * I have added a few citation needed tag for the info not present in the sources. Also, lead is barely of 3-4 sentences. Please read the GA criteria before nominating the article. - Vivvt ( Talk ) 11:43, 25 May 2016 (UTC)
 * Give me some time. I'll try to address these issues in 1-2 days. Mr. Smart ℒION  ⋠☎️✍⋡ 15:04, 30 May 2016 (UTC)
 * I've resolved the above mentioned issues. Mr. Smart ℒION  ⋠☎️✍⋡ 04:54, 1 June 2016 (UTC)


 * Final comments
 * I am seeing no much improvement to the article in terms of GA criteria, except its stable with no edit warring. Unfortunately, I will have to fail this article. - Vivvt ( Talk ) 09:26, 1 June 2016 (UTC)