Talk:Sons of the Pioneers/Archive 1

=2011=

Puffery
I've rolled back a large insertion of puffery. It's probably mixed with some good facts, but changing the lead to "The Sons of the Pioneers are America's premier Western singing group[1] whose classic recordings set the standard for all performers of Western music. Known for the high quality of their performances and recordings, they produced superb harmonies and brilliant arrangements that have survived generations of listeners and inspired numerous performers" is totally unsuitable for Wikipedia. --jpgordon:==( o ) 15:05, 25 August 2011 (UTC)
 * Apparently the editor doesn't want to discuss this, so I'll just wait until he's done and restore it to its previous status without the puffery. --jpgordon:==( o ) 15:35, 26 August 2011 (UTC)

I've addressed any wording that "may ... promote the subject through exaggeration." I do not see the words "greatest", best", "brilliant", "wonderful", "talented", "perfect", etc. in this article. If you have a problem with any sentence in this article, be specific and I'll review it.

--Bede735 (talk) 13:57, 27 August 2011 (UTC)
 * The lead paragraph is pure puffery and totally unencyclopedic. It's appropriate for a plaque at the Country Music Hall of Fame. It's not appropriate for a Wikipedia article. As far as specific words, do you really not see the word "brilliant" in "Known for the high quality of their performances and recordings, they produced superb harmonies and brilliant arrangements that have survived generations of listeners and inspired numerous performers"? Just rewrite the lede and the puffery notice can go. --jpgordon:==( o ) 14:19, 27 August 2011 (UTC)
 * On the other hand, you did tone it down considerably. But whatever does "set a new standard" mean? What would a reader unfamiliar with American Western music glean from that? How would music not "survive generations of listeners"? Leads should be plain language, with a minimum of unnecessary characterization and exaggeration. --jpgordon:==( o ) 14:30, 27 August 2011 (UTC)