Talk:Stew-Roids/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Ruby2010 (talk • contribs • count ) 02:42, 7 September 2011 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:

Comments

 * There is one dab link ✅
 * Indicate the series is American in the lead ✅
 * Fox -> Fox network ✅
 * "...and he becomes obsessed with his body." I assume Stewie becomes obsessed with his body. The sentence doesn't really make this clear ✅
 * Add ratings data to lead
 * "Peter takes the injects into Stewie, who becomes incredibly buff and develops an aggressive personality, much to the horror of his family." First part of sentence doesn't make sense. Also, there's a lot of "he"s etc; again make clear Stewie is the one taking the drugs ✅
 * Wikilink Connie D'Amico in lead ✅
 * "She turns to a reluctant Meg, who relents when a javelin thrown by Chris impales her shoulder." Who does the javelin hit? ✅
 * Don't think the "dancing naked" thing should really be wikilinked to Jame Gumb; just expand on it a little more in the cultural refs section ✅
 * Yahoo just lists the crew credits. Nowhere that I can see does it say it was Sulkin's "first episode for the season" or that it was directed "before the conclusion of the seventh production season". TV Guide might have some useful info on the first part.
 * The production section is pretty short; the DVD section shouldn't even be there (move to reception section) ✅
 * "a collection of deleted scenes, a special mini-feature which discussed the process behind animating "Road to the Multiverse", and mini-feature entitled Family Guy Karaoke." Source it ✅
 * Just delete this from guest star section. You're already citing Yahoo, and no guest stars are listed there anyway ✅
 * I think listing the guest stars as actors would be better than individually saying actress ___, actress ___ etc ✅
 * "The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show ("Now here's something we hope you'll really like"), She's All That, Michael Vick, and Silence of the Lambs - I don't see these in ref listed ✅
 * There appears to be other cultural refs you could add though
 * "...pronunciation of the word in John Mayer's "Your Body Is a Wonderland"[6]." Punctuation goes before ref
 * Use consistent ref formatting ✅
 * Ref 3: add date and author
 * Ref 5, 6, 7, : add dates


 * "Ahsan Haque of IGN gave the episode a score of 8.2 out of 10, calling Chris's storyline "engaging from start to finish" and praising Stewie's temporary build as a "hysterical visual," but criticizing the staleness of Meg's continued poor treatment and the overall condensed feel of Stewie's story, stating that he would have wished it to be more developed and saw it as a missed opportunity for the Stewie of the first couple of seasons back.[5] " Sentence is way too long, verging on a run-on. Split up or add semi-colons ✅
 * "Steve Heisler of The A.V. Club gave a much more critical review giving the episode a grade of a C, which means that it lost against American Dad which got a B-, but it tied with The King of the Hill and Sit Down and Shut Up episodes of the week both of them was graded C, but won to The Simpsons episode which got a C-. " Same with this one ✅
 * The A.V. Club is italicized
 * Sentences with direct quotes need to end with proper citations
 * For Heisler, too many "he" said this. Reuse his name to prevent reader confusion ✅

I believe you can fix these within seven days, so I'll place the review on hold for a week. Regards,  R uby   comment!  03:23, 7 September 2011 (UTC)
 * It has been seven days with no comment back. I'll give you one more day or this review will be failed. Thanks,  R uby   comment!  16:37, 14 September 2011 (UTC)

Other issues (other than unresolved comments above)
Ref 8 and 9: use consistent date formatting
 * The production section is way too short to adequately cover the topic. I don't feel comfortable promoting this article to GA status.
 * Ref 3: add publisher

In the future you should respond to GA reviews so that any unresolved issues can be clarified within the designated hold time limit. The concern with the production section is the main reason I am failing this review, though other issues also remain. Feel free to fix up the article and nominate it again at a later date. Best regards,  R uby   comment!  04:56, 15 September 2011 (UTC)