Talk:TV Bahia/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 00:32, 28 June 2022 (UTC)

Review in progress

Summary

 * You will have substantial copyediting to do to make this idiomatic.
 * The news section has a bit too much detail on anchor movements and newscast title changes. This problem affects the Programming section to a lesser extent.
 * Ref [82] (JUSTIÇA DÁ À GLOBO DIREITO DE TRANSMITIR IMAGENS TV BAHIA) does not corroborate the claim.
 * Images need alt tags.
 * References should be archived.

Placing on a 14-day hold for changes to be made. This is a longer-than-normal hold because of the unusual volume of copyediting needs; I've done 30 GAs and this is the largest number of copy changes I've asked for by far. If you have questions about the last two items, let me know and I can assist. The news section is going to take some work to not sound like "anchor goes here, news director goes there". Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 03:30, 28 June 2022 (UTC)


 * Thank you for your patience in analyzing the article and pointing out the changes needed. I nominated this article as a good article because it was considered so on the PT wiki, so I figured it would be "halfway there". I have already made the recommended changes. Answering your questions:
 * 1: "I'm struggling to parse why this was a controversy. Something about the choice of artist?" - Yes, more precisely with regard to the singer's musical style. I even made this clearer in the text for the better understanding of a non-Brazilian reader and hope it is clearer now.
 * 2: "There is no mention of TV Bahia newscasts in this reference which is supposed to corroborate that BATV launched the same night as Globo programming. If you can point it out or find the intended reference, let me know." - It is implied, but it becomes clear when the text talks about the preparation behind the scenes of the station for the beginning of the production of three newscasts, when they only produced one, "Bahia Agora". Globo's standard for the names of local newscasts is "State initials TV" (known internally as "Praça TV"). There were three editions, one shown at lunchtime, another before "Jornal Nacional" and another in the early morning. TV Aratu did not use this naming pattern (the name of its newscasts was "Aratu Notícias"). Therefore, TV Bahia was able to adopt the name "BATV". The text also mentions that after the decision allowing TV Bahia to rebroadcast Globo's programming, "a big rush was established (amidst euphoria, fast celebrations and repeated meetings) to change sets and prepare the local newscast that precedes Jornal Nacional" (i.e., "BATV 2ª Edição").
 * Some doubts on my part:
 * 1: Why not mention the award because it is only for TV Globo affiliates? At the time, there were more than 130 stations integrating the network and TV Bahia stood out in the mentioned categories among this large number of stations. I consider it relevant and think that without this paragraph the section would be left with a mostly controversial approach, without the necessary balance, since sections mostly devoted to controversies in main articles are discouraged by Wikipedia (at least in Portuguese version). However, if there really is some rule that does not allow the mention, just let me know that I will leave it out.
 * 2: How do I archive the references with the bot? Is it in "run bot"? I didn't quite understand the instructions and I'm afraid I'll use it wrong.
 * Cordially, Vini6305 (talk) 17:30, 28 June 2022 (UTC)
 * Sorry for the delay in responding, ... I've been a bit busy. You had good sense in porting the Good Article from ptwiki to enwiki—the two content concerns are indeed more a weight/style one and also the many copy changes needed in translation. It may help to send pages like this to WP:GOCE, the Guild of Copy Editors, before GA.
 * I am looking at the reference [82], now [74], again. I now see the passages you note. Globo seems to have had standard time slots for its local news programs, even if this is not directly stated, so the mere change in network affiliation would have resulted in the production of more news. However, I would not use it for the Globo Esporte mention since this is not a newscast.
 * I would support keeping the award section if you believe it is merited. I thought it was undue, but I'm also learning about Brazilian TV as I go. If these awards are rare and notable, they belong. I assumed they were not notable as not even ptwiki has an article on them.
 * As to archiving: yes. "Run Bot", authenticate with OAuth, and then type the page. It may take a while. FYI, ptwiki doesn't support this bot right now.
 * Feedback on your work:
 * Alt text: The alt text doesn't have to mirror the caption. It should describe what's being seen, sometimes very basically. If the caption covers this well, you can use "Refer to caption" as the alt text. I've added alt text to one image and the logo. I have the alt text about where I want it.
 * News: This section still has the "too many anchor movements" problem. Consider what's really encyclopedic here; stories like the dead body and Bolsonaro assault are legitimate, but a lot of "news director moved here" or "anchor changed newscasts" is overly detailed. This is really the last thing I think needing hammering out.
 * We're getting quite close! Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 21:32, 30 June 2022 (UTC)
 * I have made some corrections that you requested in the "News operation" section, reincluded the paragraph about the award, and used the bot (erroneously, but I have corrected it). I will only justify what was kept:
 * All the anchor and director changes that were kept are relevant because they represent either a change made after many years (Katia Guzzo had been the anchor of "BATV" for almost 20 years and Carlos Libório had been the journalism director of TV Bahia since its inaugural sign-on, for example) or a change related to some notable and important event for the station (the changes in 2018 were widely reported in the trade press and were, as the text says, intended to improve the station's ratings at certain slots).
 * I appreciate the guidance regarding alt texts and will use them in other articles. Cordially, Vini6305 (talk) 22:15, 30 June 2022 (UTC)
 * I invite you to look at User:Sammi Brie/TV Bahia news. What do you think of my proposed changes to the news section to slim it down and remove some of the excessive detail/anchor movements? Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 03:39, 3 July 2022 (UTC)
 * Forgot to ping . Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 03:40, 3 July 2022 (UTC)
 * There are some errors, but overall it is good. I will make some changes to this page and then you can decide if it is good or not. Vini6305 (talk) 14:05, 3 July 2022 (UTC)
 * @Vini6305: I made a final revision (some copy items). (By the way, I would make a specific suggestion to read up on the difference between "on" and "in" in English.) I think the news section has been much improved by slimming it down and making it less chaotic-seeming. I think this is GA-ready—I'm passing it!—and I look forward to seeing more Brazil TV work from you in the future. As you can see, our coverage of the topic is quite poor on the English Wikipedia (RecordTV Itapoan is a three-sentence stub here and on ptwiki it has over 100 references). If you have questions, ask me at any time. Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 20:42, 3 July 2022 (UTC)

Copy changes
Many copy changes are issues in translation. As a Spanish speaker, I can definitely hear the underlying issues from Portuguese.

Lead section

 * "on Salvador" in
 * Reorder signed on the air 10 months after receiving its license from the federal government, on March 10, 1985, being to signed on the air on March 10, 1985, 10 months after receiving its license from the federal government, making it...
 * Hyphenate "fourth-oldest"
 * "an Rede" "a Rede" and wikilink Rede Manchete
 * Wikilink TV Aratu (interlanguage link)
 * Delink BATV, which links to an unrelated item. I see that this is an article at ptwiki. It would not typically be an article here.
 * premiering in February 1999 the BahiaCop debuting the BahiaCop in February 1999
 * Salvador the seventh capital to receive the technology in the country. — making Salvador the seventh city in Brazil to receive digital television.

History

 * Rede Manchete
 * The use of "explore" here is a false cognate for what we would translate as "exploit". Even then, it's not very idiomatic for English. Suggest: On May 7, 1984, Televisão Bahia Ltda. received a concession to operate a television broadcasting service in Salvador in a decree issued by then-president João Figueiredo.
 * in a dinner at a dinner
 * then general director "then-director general"
 * "inaugration" inauguration
 * reword in addition to the presence of various authorities, such as Governor of Bahia João Durval Carneiro, the former Governor Antônio Carlos Magalhães, in addition to Archbishop of Salvador and Primate of Brazil, Dom Avelar Brandão Vilela to as well as Governor of Bahia João Durval Carneiro, former governor Antônio Carlos Magalhães, and Catholic cardinal Avelar Brandão Vilela. (We have an article on Brandão fyi)
 * remove "the" before "filmmaker", we don't use a definite article as much in English here
 * Consider translating "empresários" as "businessmen" in this context. "Entrepreneur" in English has a connotation of a startup or built-up from the ground.
 * It is not clear that "ACM Junior" is Magalhães's son—I missed this detail, which relates to the affiliation switch drama. Consider writing "Antônio Carlos Magalhães Júnior (ACM Júnior), the former governor's son".


 * Globo
 * Remove "then" before "affiliate": consider which had been its affiliate since 1969
 * "determining" "ordering" (sounds better)
 * Add "Globo president" before "Roberto Marinho" as there is no context
 * remove "then" before "then president José Sarney"
 * Take "of the 9th Civil Court..." out of commas
 * Remove comma after "Court of Justice of the State of Rio de Janeiro"
 * I'd reword TV Aratu returned, after 64 days, to retransmitting Globo's programs, but TV Bahia did not accept the order immediately and once again both broadcast the same programming. On April 4, however, TV Bahia resumed the broadcast of Manchete's programming to TV Aratu returned to rebroadcasting Globo programs, but TV Bahia did not immediately comply, resulting in both channels broadcasting the same programming until April 4, when TV Bahia resumed broadcasting Manchete programming.
 * Move comma until after "until"
 * "use this technology" isn't quite idiomatic here. I'd say making TV Bahia the fifth Globo station uplinked on the service
 * A year later, due to the polemic involving the lack of images of TV Bahia in the coverage of May 16 protests, rumors circulated in the press reported that the channel would lose its affiliation with the network due to a supposed destabilization in the relationship between the groups — there's a dire need for an interlanguage link that looks like this: May 16 protests I'd rewrite as A year later, after TV Bahia's lack of coverage of the May 16 protests created controversy, rumors circulated that Globo would remove its affiliation due to a supposed deterioration in the relationship between the network and its affiliate.
 * I'd use "reaffirmed" over "ratified": which ratified having a good relationship to which reaffirmed that it had a good relationship
 * "On 2008" "In 2008". The sentence as a whole is weird. I'd rewrite: In 2008, a dispute among TV Bahia shareholders began, with parties vying for control of the business. ACM Júnior won out, and four years later, in June 2012, César Mata Pires sold his stake
 * Add "a" before "network composed of" and change "of São Paulo" to "in São Paulo state"
 * Remove space between R$ and 9. This area should read: there was an investment of R$9 million in a new transmitter, a new 160 m antenna, and a new master control.
 * The ACM Neto mention is in a very awkward sentence. You need to make clear that ACM Neto is ACM Júnior's son. On July 21, 2012, Nelson Pelegrino, a candidate for mayor of Salvador, filed a lawsuit claiming that a report on the anniversary of Magalhães's death the previous's day featuring an interview with ACM Neto—his grandson, son of ACM Júnior, and a rival candidate—unfairly benefited Neto. Consider linking isonomy or replacing it with the more idiomatic "equality before the law".
 * Remove "elective"


 * The National Programming Award paragraph probably should be excised if these awards are only given to Globo affiliates. The mention here is undue.
 * The reason would be the losses the group went through in 2018. change to part of the previous sentence:, after the company lost money in 2018.
 * In the same year, on December, That December,

Digital television
Move this section down to the bottom and label it "Technical information". We made a change in how the US pages are organized to provide a more natural flow: history -> programming -> news -> subchannels/etc.


 * channel 29 UHF UHF channel 29
 * and on December 1 of the same year, it officially launched it, Split out as separate sentence and reduce redundancy: Digital broadcasts officially started on December 1, making the capital of Bahia...
 * using PSIP to display TV Bahia's virtual channel as 11 on digital television receivers. using virtual channel 11. I'd like to put this in a nice box and frame it. No Brazil article should mention PSIP! PSIP is a specific protocol in the ATSC (1.0) standard with no bearing on anything ISDB-T, but because Wikipedia articles on television elsewhere have looked at US pages, it propagated well beyond where it should have. I have gone through and even done mass AWB edits to remove mentions of PSIP from tables and infoboxes. (This advice needs to be taken back to the ptwiki article too.)
 * local generation — Where Portuguese would use "generar", we'd probably use "produce". Suggested rewrite of this area: After broadcasting the second leg of the Cruzeiro–Flamengo match for the Copa do Brasil, the signal was shut off at 11:59 pm and replaced by a notice from the Ministry of Science, Technology, Innovation and Communications (MCTIC) and ANATEL about the switch-off.

Programming

 * At Mosaico... On Mosaico...
 * The second paragraph needs a restructuring. The first part comes out unidiomatic and should be replaced. "Auditorium program", a reference to pt:Programa de auditório, translates as variety show in English.
 * at February 18 on February 18
 * TV Bahia was the first Rede Globo affiliate to produce locally a telenovela. The attraction, entitled Danada de Sabida, premiered on January 7, 1997. Broadcast exclusively in the state, the production was inspired by the book Já Podeis da Pátria Filhos, by the writer João Ubaldo Ribeiro, having been recorded in the cities of Cachoeira, São Francisco do Conde and São Gonçalo dos Campos. Suggesting several changes, note bolding. TV Bahia was the first Rede Globo affiliate to locally produce a telenovela. Danada de Sabida premiered on January 7, 1997. Broadcast exclusively in the state, the production was inspired by the book Já Podeis da Pátria Filhos, by João Ubaldo Ribeiro, having been filmed in the cities of Cachoeira, São Francisco do Conde and São Gonçalo dos Campos.
 * On January 5, 2019, was broadcast the first edition of musical program Sente o Som, hosted by Camila Marinho and directed by Marcela Amorim. The seven programs of the first season were scheduled for interviews with artists from Bahia and musical performances. In the same year, four editions of the program were broadcast in Portugal, as part of the special programming of carnival on the cable channel Globo Now. In Portugal, the program was aired from February 26 to 28, at 20h50. change to Musical program Sente o Som, hosted by Camila Marinho and directed by Marcela Amorim, debuted on January 5, 2019. The seven episodes of the first season featured interviews with artists from Bahia and musical performances. Four episodes were broadcast in Portugal as part of programming for Carnival on the Globo Now cable channel.
 * "Junine festivities" makes no sense. There should be a link to Festa Junina somewhere there. I'm struggling to parse why this was a controversy. Something about the choice of artist?
 * "Attractions" is used several times in a way that doesn't make sense in English.
 * I'm wondering if there is too much detail about the coming and going of recent programs on the whole. The second-to-last paragraph, for instance.
 * "homonymous state" "state of the same name". Consider an interlanguage link on TV Sergipe.
 * occupying several spaces of TV Globo programming and local programming during the period change to preempting several TV Globo and local programs
 * special programs with the best moments highlights of the event
 * See the generating/producing comment above.
 * comments by commentary by
 * "an TV Brasil-affiliated": change "an" to "a" or change to "a TV Brasil affiliate"
 * Principal Law needs an interlanguage link
 * Link Barradão

News
General comment: There is too much detail about individual anchor movements and program renames in this section, and it can be very hard to follow for a casual reader. Consider slimming this down and reading our guideline on Summary style. This section will need the most work and want you to come up with textual revisions to make it less dense. We may need to go back and forth on this section in particular and it will likely require more copyediting when slimmed down.


 * , being anchored by Paulo and anchored by Paulo (note no comma)
 * Globo's former newscaster — "former Globo newscaster"
 * Two hyphens and spell out word in "three-minute-long"
 * "is broadcast" "was broadcast"
 * "Paulo, which went to" — this should be "who" as a person, not "which"
 * The morning show began to be presented in duo The morning show switched to a two-anchor format
 * Also in 1993, TV Bahia re-released Bahia Agora, this time aired in two editions, replacing Jornal da Manhã and BATV 1ª Edição Change to Jornal da Manhã and BATV 1ª Edição readopted the Bahia Agora name that year. (No need to mention the anchors stayed)
 * "On July 1995" should be "In July 1995". The floating "Was anchored by Anna Valéria" should be integrated into the sentence.
 * on the 1996 municipal elections "in" (another preposition error)
 * premiered replacing add comma
 * The new newscast brought together, in its presentation, the anchors of both replaced programs, also counting with Genildo Lawinscky's comments. You could straight up say the programs were merged. There may be too much detail about non-notable presenters.
 * Mentioning Bahia Agora's recurrence as a title for newsbreaks is too much detail and can be excised.
 * also continued to command the news program — I assume you meant "host"?
 * "remotion" should be "removal"
 * "film reporter" should be "cameraman"
 * "region of extreme south" — "far southern"
 * Remove comma after "TV Bahia reporters"
 * "reflected in" — maybe "reported on"?

Source checks
I have randomly selected 12 of the 144 references for spot checks: 14, 15, 22, 47, 48, 76, 82, 108, 113, 122, 140, 144 (redrew for more even section coverage). Be back soon for this.


 * 14 (Folha de SP 1-23-87): Checks out
 * 15 (Jornal do Brasil 1-25-87): Checks out and supports the Jornal Nacional announcement.
 * 22 (Tela Viva 2000): Checks out
 * 47 (Bahia Notícias 2007): Mentions discontinuation of Na Carona in 2007.
 * 48 (BahiaNoAr 2013): Very brief mention of Na Carona — might not even be needed.
 * 76: The program load adds up to 4 hours 15 minutes of local news on weekdays in Jornal da Manhã, Bahia Meio Dia, and BATV.
 * 82: There is no mention of TV Bahia newscasts in this reference which is supposed to corroborate that BATV launched the same night as Globo programming. If you can point it out or find the intended reference, let me know.
 * 108: Mentions the Beltrão/Guzzo anchor pairing. (Though this is too much detail)
 * 113: Article on the cancellation of the helicopter contract.
 * 122: Corroborates claim about hiring of new news director.
 * 140: Corroborates Globo's "repudiation" of the attacks including on the Aratu news team.
 * 144: Biography mentions Fontes Mendes's work at TV Bahia.

Other items

 * Earwig (copyright violation) doesn't show any issues. You should, however, tag the talk page to note that this page contains a translation from ptwiki. See Translation.
 * Use IABot to archive references.
 * The images are all freely licensed. They need alt tags, descriptions of their content for visually impaired users. Read MOS:ALT. In the infobox, you do this with the logo_alt field.