Talk:Theodore Roosevelt High School (Kent, Ohio)/Archive 2

Possible Good Article Candidate (WP:GAC)
This article has been reworked and it has been suggesed that  it  may  be approaching  Good Article quality. Please check it over and feel free to  make any  suggestions. As usual at htis stage, discussion  is preferred over bold, major edits. It will  also  need a thorough, final review before being prosed.--Kudpung (talk) 05:47, 4 October 2010 (UTC)

Review
I have essentially rewritten this article from the bottom up. I would appreciate any additional editors who could have a look at it and provide some feedback on its neutrality, any potential POV or peacock works/phrases, and if it has excessive detail as I get it ready for GAN and ultimately FAC. I was definitely going for thorough, but would just like some additional opinions to make sure I didn't go off the deep end here. Thanks for anyone who can help. Feel free to change its quality rating if you feel it should be changed from the current "C" rating. --JonRidinger (talk) 12:12, 4 October 2010 (UTC)

Comments from Cunard
What an engaging, well-researched article! Here are a few comments:
 * "The campus has also had several expansions and changes both to the building and to the grounds includes 67.9 acres (27.5 ha) of space that includes several athletic facilities and practice fields." – I don't understand this sentence beginning from "includes 67.9 acres..." Perhaps this could be reworded?
 * Yikes, I reworded that. Not sure what happened there when it was written as it makes NO sense.  This is why I am glad other people look at it!
 * The article has several "As of" statements. Maybe you could tag them with As of per the reasons listed at WP:DATED?
 * That's a good idea. Because it has statistics that change every year (enrollment, demographics, even course offerings to a lesser degree), it definitely has lots of information that has to have the "As of".  I didn't even know there was a template for that!
 * "Would" – eliminating most "would"s will the article's tense more consistent.
 * "The Union School would serve as the home of all Kent students until two additional K–6 elementary schools were constructed in the 1880s and would eventually come to be known as Central School." – perhaps this is better: "The Union School served as the home of all Kent students until two additional K–6 elementary schools were constructed in the 1880s and eventually came to be known as Central School."
 * "Nutting would later teach at and eventually become principal of the Union School building until 1888." – "Nutting later taught at and eventually became principal of the Union School building until 1888."
 * "The Union/Central building would remain in service as a K–8 school until 1953" – "The Union/Central building remained in service as a K–8 school until 1953"
 * There are several more instances of "would" sprinkled throughout the article that could be rephrased.
 * Agree. I was trying to get a consistent tense for the entire thing as well as try to avoid personifying the school.  Obviously I missed some stuff.  Thanks for the suggestions.  I used them all.

I recommend that you take a look at Wikiproject Schools (if you haven't done so already), to see examples of school featured articles. Though you have just nominated it for GAN, I believe it's very close to being an FA. Good luck, Cunard (talk) 07:54, 5 October 2010 (UTC)
 * In the "Curriculum" section: "It combines and shares" – what does "it" refer to? The previous subject is plural.
 * "It" referred to the Six District Educational Compact. I reworded it slightly as well as changed the next sentence which started with "The compact...".
 * "Two academy programs are available for students in grades 9 and 10, Bridges Academy and Expedition Academy, with an additional online education academy, the Rough Rider Twilight Academy, available for students in all grades who have a variety of extenuating circumstances." – this sentence might need clarification or splitting into shorter sentences so that it is easier to read and understand.
 * Reworded into separate sentences. When I first wrote that section it was only for two.  Only after school started and I read the Fall newsletter did I even know about the third one starting.
 * "Since then the two have continued to schedule each other in a variety of sports..." – is there another word you could use for "schedule"? I don't understand this sentence.
 * I would say "meet". Scheduling obviously makes sense to me in sports (I hear it all the time in college athletics), but I guess it's not as universal as I thought. :)
 * Hmm, I didn't know that "schedule each other" can mean "meet each other". You learn something new every day. ;)
 * Ref #1 – is there a more direct link that can be provided?
 * Unfortunately no. Perhaps I can include specific instructions on what to search for in the citation?  I did something similar for a citation that only linked to the general search page as part of an FAC for Kent, Ohio.  I'm sure there's a way to link directly to search results, but it's beyond my knowledge.
 * I went to the website, selected "United States", "Ohio", and typed in "Kent". The school's code appears, but there is no change in url. The school's code is also listed at http://qry.regents.state.oh.us/cgi-pub/ode_high_sch_cgi and https://www.albert.nyu.edu:4901/schools/secondary/US_OH-18.html but it isn't that obvious from the context of those pages. My suggestion is that you either use these pages or include specific instructions for how to find the school's code in the citation. Cunard (talk) 06:18, 6 October 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks for your comments. When I was writing this, I often referred to the few FA high school articles we have such as Plano Senior High School and Stuyvesant High School, as well as what I learned in 2 FACs with Kent, Ohio.  Hope to have this one there soon.  --JonRidinger (talk) 18:23, 5 October 2010 (UTC)

FUR for logo
This is a standard, perfectly acceptyable FUR that I have used on  a hundred or so  UK  schools pages that  I  work  on or create:

=== Fair use in xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx === Though this image is subject to copyright, its use is covered by the U.S. fair use laws, and the stricter requirements of Wikipedia's non-free content policies, because:
 * 1) Source: school website Retrieved: DD Month 20XX
 * 2) It illustrates an educational article about the entity that the logo represents.
 * 3) The image is used as a school  infobox illustration.
 * 4) It is a low resolution image, and thus not suitable for production of counterfeit goods.
 * 5) The logo is not used in such a way that a reader would be confused into believing that the article is written or authorized by the owner of the logo.
 * 6) It is not replaceable with an uncopyrighted or freely copyrighted image of comparable educational value.

Just copy  it, fill  in  the XXXXXXXXXs  and paste it  into  the FUR  box on  the upload form. It will  render like this:

Fair use in xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Though this image is subject to copyright, its use is covered by the U.S. fair use laws, and the stricter requirements of Wikipedia's non-free content policies, because:
 * 1) Source: [xxxxxxx school website] Retrieved
 * 2) It illustrates an educational article about the entity that the logo represents.
 * 3) The image is used as a school  infobox illustration.
 * 4) It is a low resolution image, and thus not suitable for production of counterfeit goods.
 * 5) The logo is not used in such a way that a reader would be confused into believing that the article is written or authorized by the owner of the logo.
 * 6) It is not replaceable with an uncopyrighted or freely copyrighted image of comparable educational value.

For copyright, select 'logo' from  the drop  dpwn menu. --Kudpung (talk) 23:44, 6 October 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks...great minds think alike because this is the template I replaced what was previously there. :)