Talk:Thomas Percy (Gunpowder Plot)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Sarastro1 (talk) 22:00, 4 November 2010 (UTC)

The article is excellent, very comprehensive and engaging. I imagine it's not a long way from FA. Just a few minor nitpicks and feel free to argue about them.


 * "whom he supposed had reneged on his promises of toleration for English Catholics" Is supposed the correct word as it suggests that he suspected? I would have thought "believed" would be better.
 * I'm trying to find a word that satisfies what he thought James had done, and what James actually did. Its my understanding that James may have said one thing and did another, but that Percy took far more from James's vague assurances than was appropriate.  Its a difficult one, as whatever assurances James did give, they weren't anything like what Percy reported.  I'm not sure that "believed" would be better as I don't know if Percy understood how much...erm, bullshit... was coming out of his mouth :)
 * In which case, if it's all a bit woolly, "supposed" would probably be better. --Sarastro1 (talk) 22:32, 4 November 2010 (UTC)
 * How did Percy get such important roles from Henry Percy when they were not close relations?
 * The Percy family operated a bit of a clan system, as such as a family member he got a job. Henry Percy was a very wealthy man.  It seems that Percy got the job of intermediary because he was a bit of a brutish individual who wouldn't take any crap.  Perhaps Henry Percy believed that Thomas Percy would impress James, but its all speculation.  The fact is, for whatever reason, he got the job.
 * "exercised his authority in a manner which gave some cause for complaint, not least an officer he replaced": Is there a word missing? Should it be "not least from an officer he replaced"?
 * I'll take advice on that but if I replaced "an officer" with "Joe Bloggs, whom he replaced", I don't think a "from" would work.
 * True, but would "which gave some cause for complaint, not least Joe Bloggs he replaced" work? --Sarastro1 (talk) 22:32, 4 November 2010 (UTC)
 * I took some advice from Malleus and have added a 'from' Parrot of Doom 01:07, 5 November 2010 (UTC)
 * "Considering James's "quaint" spoken English there may have been some misunderstanding on both sides." Is quaint a direct quote?
 * Almost, Alan Haynes says "quaintness". I'll rephrase it slightly.  I don't think its necessary to add a cite there, as its only a single word.
 * How did Catesby know about the letter?
 * Its explained in the main article and in Catesby's article. How he found out isn't particularly relevant to Percy's story.
 * The article needs Persondata.
 * I don't believe that's a GA requirement, but isn't it just as simple as pressing a button or something?
 * No, I don't think it's a requirement, but most GAs I've seen have it. And there's no button unfortunately. Or if there is, no-one told me! --Sarastro1 (talk) 22:32, 4 November 2010 (UTC)
 * DABlinks and images fine. Refs check out that I have sampled.
 * Nitpick: should ref 3 and ref 6 have a note about subscription, like the other ODNB ref?
 * Done Parrot of Doom 22:13, 4 November 2010 (UTC)

These are so slight, I won't bother to put it on hold straight away as I imagine they can be fixed really quickly. --Sarastro1 (talk) 22:00, 4 November 2010 (UTC)
 * Oh and thankyou for the kind compliments, they're very much appreciated :) Parrot of Doom 22:19, 4 November 2010 (UTC)
 * Passing now. --Sarastro1 (talk) 21:10, 5 November 2010 (UTC)
 * Cool, thanks for the quick review. Don't suppose you fancy doing the rest, do you.... ;)  I'm angling for a Gunpowder Plot featured topic.  Not far off now. Parrot of Doom 21:15, 5 November 2010 (UTC)