Talk:Tom Acker/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 11:49, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Am reviewing for the July 2021 GAN Backlog Drive MWright96 (talk) 11:49, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Pass/Fail:

Lead

 * "Thomas James Acker (March 7, 1930 – January 4, 2021) was an American baseball pitcher who played four seasons in Major League Baseball (MLB). He played his entire career for the Cincinnati Reds from 1956 to 1959." - how about merging these two sentences together so it reads '''Thomas James Acker (March 7, 1930 – January 4, 2021) was an American baseball pitcher who played his entire career for the Cincinnati Reds in four seasons of Major League Baseball (MLB) from 1956 to 1959.
 * Sure, that works. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)


 * How about wikilinking the term draft for non-sports readers only on the first mention?
 * I linked in the second mention in the lead, because the first was right after the linked Buffalo Bisons and I want to avoid MOS:SEAOFBLUE. Hope that's alright. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)


 * Cincinnati Reds does not need be wikilinked twice in the lead
 * Fixed. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)


 * "He played his last game on September 20, 1959. He subsequently worked at the Meadowlands Racetrack from its opening in 1976 until 1992." - simiar issue to the first point in this section
 * Merged. —Bloom6132 (talk) 18:27, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Early life

 * Wikilink amateur free agent to the relevant article for non-sports reade
 * Done. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Minor leagues

 * "and 213 strikeouts over 201 innings" - innings can be wikilinked
 * I linked that back in the "Early life" section ("102 strikeouts in 63 innings pitched". Should I link it in this section too, or will that be MOS:DUPLINK? —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
 * I was referring to Inning as a whole MWright96 (talk) 17:47, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
 * done. —Bloom6132 (talk) 18:27, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Cincinnati Reds (1956–1959)

 * "and striking out three (including Gene Baker, Acker's first batter faced)[2] over 2 innings in a 12–1 loss to the Chicago Cubs." - try to avoid having a reference positioned like this
 * Fixed – moved to the end of the sentence. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)


 * "The Athletics assigned him to Richmond Virginians," - to the
 * Fixed. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Post-playing career

 * "After retiring from baseball, Acker went back home to Bergen County, New Jersey. He constructed a house in Wyckoff and was employed by a trucking company." - how about merging these two sentences together
 * Done. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)


 * "After retiring from baseball, Acker went back home" - returned to be more concise
 * Done. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:19, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Personal life

 * "Acker died on January 4, 2021, at his home in Narvon, Pennsylvania." - sentence is a little close to the source verifying it
 * I've changed "home" to "house" and moved his age to the beginning of the sentence. Hope the rest is covered by WP:LIMITED, because I cannot use "passed away" due to MOS:EUPHEMISM. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:30, 2 July 2021 (UTC)

Am putting the review on hold to allow the nominator to address or query the points raised above MWright96 (talk) 15:46, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
 * thanks very much for the review! I hope I've addressed your comments satisfactorily. —Bloom6132 (talk) 17:30, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
 * Now promoting to GA class MWright96 (talk) 18:42, 2 July 2021 (UTC)