Talk:Toyah Battersby/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Lemonade51 (talk · contribs) 13:47, 21 August 2013 (UTC)

Yay, a Corrie article.


 * Lead
 * Would cite the direct quote in the lead, even if it is done so in the body of the article.
 * "since the character was said to born during the height of her career", insert 'be' between 'to' and 'born'
 * "The following year, the character was the focus of one of Coronation Streets", apostrophe after s in Coronation Street.
 * "Taylor decided to leave the show in July 2002; her character left Weatherfield for London.", would be nice to clarify that Toyah left in a year after Taylor announced her departure.
 * The British Soap Awards is italicised.


 * Storylines
 * "Toyah and her step-sister Leanne (Jane Danson)", and in development "Graham explained that both Toyah and her step-sister" → stepsister without the hyphen.
 * "Toyah gets a job at the local cafe", would be nice to name the cafe (Roy's Rolls I'd imagine?)
 * "Toyah has a romance with Sam and moves into a flat with Fiz Brown (Jennie McAlpine) and Maria Sutherland (Samia Ghadie).", what is the relationship between these two facts? If they don't have a bearing on one another (which I imagine), they should be split into two seperate sentences.
 * "Toyah starts dating her collage tutor John Arnley", college?


 * Creation and casting, development
 * Taylor was studying for her A-levels", would wikilink A-Level for those unfamiliar.
 * "She was not successful, but she then auditioned for Toyah and won the role", rephrase to "She was unsuccessful, so she then auditioned..."
 * Eyeliner is traditionally one word (under, "a lot of black eye liner and no foundation"), despite of the Wikipedia article saying otherwise.
 * "Taylor said the storyline was one of the hardest she had to film and explained " insert colon after film.

Metro, Daily Mirror and Daily Record need location parameters (all of which London). Shall pass once comments have been addressed; on hold until then. Lemonade51 (talk) 13:47, 21 August 2013 (UTC)


 * Thank you so much for the (quick) review, I believe I've addressed everything. - JuneGloom    Talk  00:07, 22 August 2013 (UTC)
 * Happy to pass now. Lemonade51 (talk) 13:58, 22 August 2013 (UTC)
 * Thank you! - JuneGloom    Talk  18:10, 22 August 2013 (UTC)