Talk:Tropical Storm Ileana (2018)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: KN2731 (talk · contribs) 08:00, 23 December 2018 (UTC)

Will do in a while. ~ KN2731 {t · c} 08:00, 23 December 2018 (UTC)


 * Lead
 * I'd replace "convective activity" with "thunderstorm activity" to keep the lead simple.
 * "became intertwined within Hurricane John's circulation" - first, I believe it should be intertwined with; and second, perhaps add "nearby Hurricane John" to show a link.


 * MH
 * Pipe link convection to atmospheric convection at first usage.
 * Link "wind shear" to vertical wind shear.
 * "The depression then began to strengthen" sounds a bit contradictory to the preceding mention of unfavorable wind shear. Maybe add "Despite the disruptive wind shear" or something to that effect.
 * "its center was embedded within a central dense overcast-like feature that had developed" - link central dense overcast, and IMO adding "developed over the system" would be clearer.
 * Temperatures: use convert templates? E.g.  would produce -85 to -90 C.
 * "Additionally, a central dense overcast with a banded eye feature had developed" - I feel "Additionally, a banded eye feature had developed within the central dense overcast" has better flow since earlier you already mention a developing CDO.
 * "Six hours later, microwave imagery and Acapulco radar" - the "Six hours later" makes this sound too precise, since the storm does evolve between advisories. I'd just remove that.


 * Prep and impact
 * From what I gather Laguna de Tres Palos is a place name and probably doesn't need to be translated to "Lagoon of Tres Palos".

I'll list these issues for now, and see if I can find any more. ~ KN2731 {t · c} 08:34, 23 December 2018 (UTC)
 * Okay, those issues should be fixed. Let me know if you find anything else. Noah Talk 14:24, 23 December 2018 (UTC)
 * just one more thing, Chilpancingo is a city in Guerrero, so all four deaths should be in Guerrero. Otherwise no more issues from me. ~ KN2731 {t · c} 07:25, 24 December 2018 (UTC)
 * Okay, I fixed that. Noah Talk 14:10, 24 December 2018 (UTC)
 * Passing. Nicely done. ~ KN2731 {t · c} 03:07, 25 December 2018 (UTC)