Talk:Twinkle Khanna/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 19:30, 17 April 2015 (UTC)

I'll have this complete by tomorrow ☠ Jag  uar  ☠ 19:30, 17 April 2015 (UTC)

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria


 * 1) Is it reasonably well written?
 * A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:
 * B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
 * 1) Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
 * A. Has an appropriate reference section:
 * B. Citation to reliable sources where necessary:
 * C. No original research:
 * 1) Is it broad in its coverage?
 * A. Major aspects:
 * B. Focused:
 * 1) Is it neutral?
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) Is it stable?
 * No edit wars, etc:
 * 1) Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
 * A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
 * B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * 1) Is it stable?
 * No edit wars, etc:
 * 1) Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
 * A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
 * B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * Pass or Fail:

Initial comments

 * "Twinkle Khanna (also known by her birth name Tina Jatin Khanna) born on 29 December 1974" - no need for this part, it should just read Twinkle Khanna (also known as Tina Jatin Khanna). Also her date of birth needs to be in brackets
 * "She is the daughter of established actors, Dimple Kapadia and Rajesh Khanna" - no need for comma
 * "Her last major appearance was in Love Ke Liye Kuch Bhi Karega (2001)" - last major appearence in a film? Considering she has done work outside the film industry since 2001...
 * "is the co-owner of The White Window store" - is this just one store or a chain of notable stores?
 * "She does not has a professional degree and learnt the skills" - learned
 * "In 2009, a police case was lodged against Khanna for obscenity during a Fashion Week." - what kind of obscenity? Seems interesting enough that the lead must summarise!
 * "Khanna was in his mind for the role of Tina in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, but she refused it and thus Rani Mukerji was signed" - was Mukerji signed for the role in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai?
 * "She has opened up another branch of the store elsewhere in Mumbai" - this was not mentioned in the lead, only stating that she had one store
 * The Personal life and In the media could just be renamed "Personal Life". Also why is "In the media" capitalised?

On hold
Overall the article is well sourced and comprehensive but the only thing stopping this from meeting the GA criteria are some of the prose. I'm confident that if all of the above can be addressed then this could meet the GA criteria. The lead does mostly summarise and is neutral etc, so this is nearly there. Good luck ☠  Jag  uar  ☠ 19:07, 18 April 2015 (UTC)
 * I think the issues mentioned above have been resolved. For the obscenity case, I think we should follow WP:BLP and avoid mentioning it in the lead. It can be added there if you feel it is really necessary. Sorry for the late response, I was very busy in real life. Regards, --Skr15081997 (talk) 07:41, 25 April 2015 (UTC)
 * Thank you both for addressing them! Yeah you're right about WP:BLP, I agree with you that it should be left out of the lead. Anyway, thanks to the efforts made this article now meets the GA criteria in every aspect, so promoting ☠  Jag  uar  ☠ 11:32, 25 April 2015 (UTC)