Talk:Typhoon Irma (1981)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) 22:25, 8 May 2014 (UTC)

All in all, a decent article, but there are some issues. Lemme know when you take care of these. ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 22:25, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * I'm gonna have to call shenanigans for the first sentence. It was only a C2. Betty in the previous year was a C3 at Philippine landfall.
 * Changed. YE Pacific  Hurricane
 * "The twenty-fifth named storm, fourteenth typhoon, and second super typhoon of the near-average 1981 Pacific typhoon season" - this is a long beginning to the sentence. I'd cut "near average"
 * Cut that and the super typhoon bit. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "Irma reached its peak wind speed of 205 km/h (125 mph)" - so this is per JMA, right? If so, you should clarify, as the mention of "super typhoon" earlier implies it uses JTWC winds.
 * Removed the super typhoon mention. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * What is Malia, linked in the lede? There is no mention of Philippines there. Do you mean Manila?
 * Yes. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "Nearly 40,000 people were homeless. Irma destroyed or damaged 119,233 dwellings." - these are too short and choppy. Try merging.
 * Done. YE Pacific  Hurricane
 * "150th meridian east and the 170th meridian east" - why do you mention the longitude? That means nothing to most people.
 * What else should I mention? YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "After passing north of Guam, both agencies upgraded Irma into a tropical storm." - the agencies passed north of Guam?
 * Reworked. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "Thereafter, Irma turned east as a subtropical ridge built north and northwest of the storm" - the track doesn't suggest this.
 * It's west now :P YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "and the later reporting winds" - I think you mean "latter"
 * True statement. It has been corrected. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "as Irma neared landfall" - there a reason why this sentence begins lowercase?
 * Corrected. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "Virtually every house was demolished due to storm surge in Benagaspasan,[13] a small town with a population 1,000.[14] A total of 47 killed in the village. Thirty-seven were injured in Bengaspasan as well." - I feel like these three sentences could be killed.
 * No way. That's where arguably the worst effects were. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "One army officer noted that died via electrocution while trying to fix the roof of his dwelling[19] in Makati." - poor grammar here, not sure what's going on.
 * Better? YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * The pic in the impact section should be right-aligned to alternate with the storm path map.
 * Fine. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * I kinda feel like Death by coconut should be linked here - "...and a farmer in Quezon died after being hit by a falling coconut."
 * ✅. YE Pacific  Hurricane
 * Does flooding really have to be linked?
 * Removed. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "The majority of huts were flattened." - where?
 * Axed with my hammer. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "sustained little damaged" - grammar
 * Fixed. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "Seventy-two others were wounded." - I don't get why this is placed where it is. Why not put it where you mention the deaths?
 * Moved. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)
 * "The decaying remnants of Irma then 105 to 150 mm (5 to 5 in) of rain and winds of up to 72 km/h (45 mph) to Okinawa." - missing verb
 * Added. YE Pacific  Hurricane 23:20, 8 May 2014 (UTC)