Talk:Virginia Conventions/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 01:27, 28 January 2017 (UTC)

I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 01:27, 28 January 2017 (UTC)


 * Sorting through the external links report, I've relinked the three that were dead.
 * One link that is to a front page with a search feature is reported as "forbidden", but searching on the reference sourced produces the page viewed. Is that sufficient? TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:05, 1 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Yes, it's fine.
 * The copyvio detector in "Good article tools" finds direct quotes attributed to sourced material to be rationale for asserting only 40% confidence that there is no violation of copyright.
 * This seems misdiagnosed for two reasons. First of all, the quotes are noted inside quotation marks and properly sourced, and second, the journals of convention debates are in the public domain as they are from one hundred and fifty years ago.
 * Nevertheless, the passages can be paraphrased as needed. I had thought to let the simple eloquence of the western delegates speak for themselves. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:20, 1 February 2017 (UTC)


 * You're fine since you attributed these phrases.
 * Start off with "The" Virginia Conventions have been, but don't bold the word since it's not part of the actual title.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:11, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * centuries across territory put "the" in front of territory
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:11, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Tell the reader that by fundamental law, you mean a constitution.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:11, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * And don't capitalize the word constitution since you're not referring to any particular one. This seems to be a general problem, so go through the article and decapitalize words and phrases that don't refer to a particular convention or commission. Forex: Alternatives to the conventions used Commissions for Constitutional Reform in 1927 for restructuring state government and in 1969 to conform the state Constitution with Congressional statutes of the Voting Rights Act and U.S. Constitutional law. Aside from the first word, the only legitimate capitalizations in this entire sentence are Voting Rights Act and U.S. Constitution.
 * ✅ reviewing 103 "constitution"s. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:11, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * The first Virginia Conventions assumed authority from elected delegates in a series of five self-governing political meetings administering the legislative, executive and judicial functions of government in the Colony of Virginia during the American Revolution. Wording in this is a little convoluted, IMO, and should be merged with the following sentence and shortened. Something like: "The first five Virginia Conventions replaced the British colonial government"... And the whole thing should be be merged with the next paragraph.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:31, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * five unlimited state Constitutional Conventions What does unlimited mean here? Is this to differentiate them from the Conventions of 1861?
 * ✅ Their jurisdictions were unrestricted; 1861 was restricted to secession, although it wrote a constitution that was rejected in referendum after it replaced the General Assembly under the "emergency". TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:31, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Constitutional provisions for special attention in the 1969 Commission related to the 14th Amendment's provisions for Due Process and Equal Protection as they related to education, voting rights and representation. This sentence seems to be an elaboration of the previous one and a little too detailed for the lede since it's not much of a summary.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:31, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * In the post-Civil War map, what about the Eastern Shore? Is that part of the Tidewater? And you're missing a couple of "the"s. Notably, The Tidewater and the Piedmont.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:31, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Link viva voce, freeholder
 * ✅ linked the first instance of each. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:31, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Peyton Randolph continued to serve as the President of the Convention. Redundant to earlier statement
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:06, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Don't abbreviate months. Oct 1775
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:06, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * ordinance for raising additional troops Suggest "to raise" instead
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:06, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Gallery of Virginia Constitutional conventions Shouldn't this be a gallery of leaders of Virginia constitutional conventions?
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:06, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Move link for Edmund Pendleton to first use.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:06, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Tons of overlinking, use this script to find them.
 * That looks like a good tool to add to my toolbox. The page User:TheVirginiaHistorian/common.js is created, and the code importScript('User:TheVirginiaHistorian/duplinks.js'); // User:TheVirginiaHistorian/duplinks is added, but “duplicate links” does not appear in the tools index when I enter the edit page.
 * It should be available in read and edit modes. It shows up as Highlight duplicate links towards the bottom of the tool menu on the left side. It is not available on talk pages.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 15:40, 4 February 2017 (UTC)
 * Rats, it still does not appear. I was hoping that it did not show because it would take a couple of hours to come online, or because I had miscoded something. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 17:34, 4 February 2017 (UTC)
 * As a matter of style, are links to be duplicated in the Gallery and in the Chart of Virginia conventions in addition to first time occurring in the text?TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 12:29, 4 February 2017 (UTC)
 * I don't think so. Aside from the infobox, I link a term or person the first time that a reader will encounter it, be that in a picture caption or whatever. If it's really close, and likely to depend on the size of the reader's monitor, I'll privilege the text, but that's just me. There aren't any hard and fast rules.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 15:40, 4 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Down to Ratifying, more later.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 17:37, 3 February 2017 (UTC)
 * Constitution in the Philadelphia Convention, chose in Virginia's Ratifying Convention remove the last bit as redundant as we already know what convention this is
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * George Mason had refused to sign due to the lack of a Bill of Rights in Philadelphia would continue in his opposition. awkward, rephrase
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Edmund Randolph had changed from his opposition in the Philadelphia Convention to now supporting adoption for the sake of preserving the Union. We already know what he'd done, merge this into the next sentence and explain his reasoning.
 * ✅, better distinguishing Randolph from Mason. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * "Old Capitol" where the Ratifying (Federal) Convention met, 1788. The "Old Capitol" and delete the period
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * hyphenate slave owning and three generation
 * ✅, three generation now reads three generations. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Link county/counties on first use, Chief Justice, convention floor, planter elite, Second American Party System
 * ✅ but for county links. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * militia in there future defense typo
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Though the planter elite and their representatives in the ruling Democratic "Richmond Junto" continued to resist any change. Western Democrats and Whigs were more inclined to a white population basis in their determination to expand suffrage and find a more equitable reapportionment between east and west sections. replace the period with a comma and delete "sections" as these are really one sentence
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Direct popular election of governor "the" governor; more than one usage of this phrase
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * The House of Delegates to be on the white population basis, giving the western counties a majority, and for the Senate to be on a modified mixed basis of population and property including slaves, giving the eastern counties a majority. Need a verb or two here.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Down to Secession--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 17:35, 7 February 2017 (UTC)
 * I have manually unlinked several names in text, gallery and chart as I was able to discover them duplicated. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 18:18, 7 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Conditional Unionist faction with the Lincoln requisition of troops delete the and change to "Lincoln's"
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Harper's Ferry federal armory Rephrase this as "federal Harper's Ferry Armory"
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * produced a resolution to secede 88 for, 55 against Not quite, I don't think. I believe that Wise got a resolution to secede introduced with the vote total that you give. Rephrase.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Wheeling, Virginia (1863 WV) Expand this, we both know you mean here, but ordinary readers are't going to know that you mean that the city became part of WV in 1863
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Unlike in Kentucky and Missouri, Federal arms were unable to reclaim Virginia counties for incorporation into the Restored Government by 1863, and West Virginia was made its own state. Use Union Army rather than Federal arms and clarify that these were the western counties. also, at the end, "WV was made into its own state"
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * pro-Union Alexandria, Virginia State Journal, featured accounts of some debate, but only one edition of the Journal remains covering the convention What's the exact name of the newspaper, the State Journal? If so, put a comma after Virginia. And use survives instead of remains.
 * ✅, italicizing Virginia State Journal. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Link Radical Republicans, President Grant
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Move the link for Fairfax Co. to its first use
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * The Radicals in Convention Is there a missing "the" here?
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * And you need to do another sweep decapitalizing convention when it's not used together with an identifier like Secession Convention, etc. I've removed a couple of them for you.
 * ✅. I defer to the WP MOS. The discrepancy comes in the literature which often capitalizes any constitutional convention because the unlimited convention creating a constitution and its constitution is by the authority of the sovereign people, superior to legislative statute, judicial ruling, and executive fiat. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 11:59, 14 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Down to 1902--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 23:07, 13 February 2017 (UTC)
 * I just got my copy of Leonard's "The General Assembly" (1978) yesterday, to confirm the existence of the 1933 Limited Convention mentioned in an email from the Library of Virginia reference desk. The previous fifteen volumes surveyed in the Bibliography made no note of it that I could find previously. I hope that addition does not make the article "unstable", as I believe that term refers only to contested entries at the time of GA review. As you might have guessed my sustained interest in this topic for over a year continues to bring new insights. Recent new acquisitions that may bear on the topic: Chandler's "History of suffrage in Virginia" The John Hopkins Press (1901), and Green's "Constitutional development in the South Atlantic states, 1776-1860", University of North Carolina Press (1930). TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 09:10, 17 February 2017 (UTC)


 * No, don't worry about it.
 * Following Reconstruction of the 1870s, Virginia and other states of the former Confederacy restricted the suffrage by segregationist Jim Crow laws, and by 1890 there began a phase of Southern states constitutionally removing large numbers of whites and most blacks from voter registration. Awkward, especially the first bit. Start off with something like "After the end of Reconstruction in X," substitute "with" for "by" and either split the sentence at By 1890 or use a semi-colon instead of "and" there.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Link Reconstruction, Jim Crow, Progressive Democrat, carpetbagger, scalawag, bayonet, Richmond Dispatch, State Corporation Commission, poll tax, illiterate, disenfranchise, Democratic Organization, if not already linked.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Move the more detailed explanation of Martin and his machine to the first mention of it.
 * I'm not sure I can place the two instances....
 * 1902 convention
 * ✅ found it. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 02:11, 23 February 2017 (UTC)

TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)
 * and it was upheld in the Virginia Supreme Court of Appeals I gather that it was challenged by a corporation(s)? If so, give a few details and link to the court.
 * ✅ It was challenged by several railroads. I cannot find the name of the case or other details. State Corporation Commission (Virginia) is of little help.
 * Good enough. Probably ought to link to the commission as well.
 * ✅, also removed duplicate reference to SCC establishment. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 02:11, 23 February 2017 (UTC)

TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)
 * and was appointed Virginia Chief Justice Robert R. Prentis its chair. Fix this and this: Virginia joined thirty-two other states in in 1996 by amending its Constitution
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Virginia has also followed the lead of other states. Either use this properly as the lede for a separate paragraph that would include the Defense of Marriage amendment para, or delete it entirely.
 * ✅ TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Standardize the use of title case for all the titles in your bibliography and external links.
 * ✅ -- "Old Dominion" meaning Virginia is left capitalized, though in a title, "dominion to republic" is not. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)


 * Whew!--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 17:10, 21 February 2017 (UTC)
 * Not quite what I mean. Title case is where almost everything in a title is capitalized. See Title case.
 * Forty-six capitalized words in titles are now in lower case. "Virginia Constitutional Convention (1864)" is all capitalized because it refers to the particular 1864 Convention? TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 02:11, 23 February 2017 (UTC)
 * You've completely misunderstood me. Title case is where almost everything in a title is capitalized, not less. I suggest you copy the bibliography from an older version to eliminate all of your de-capitalizations and then start capitalizing. And that includes subtitles as well.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:53, 23 February 2017 (UTC)
 * How am I doing? Obviously we can revisit anything I've tried to correct and labelled as "done". I guess it should be that I say "addressed", and your reply might be "done". TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 10:54, 22 February 2017 (UTC)
 * Just a few bits still to deal with.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 15:28, 22 February 2017 (UTC)
 * All of your changes look fine, other than decapitalizing things.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:53, 23 February 2017 (UTC)
 * Sorry. Recapitalization in Bibliography and External Links ((done}}. TheVirginiaHistorian (talk) 14:56, 23 February 2017 (UTC)
 * One minor little niggle is that the first word in a subtitle is capitalized, even if it's one that ordinarily doesn't get captialized like "the" or "A". But I'm going to promote this anyway and you can deal with that at your leisure.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 15:10, 23 February 2017 (UTC)