Talk:Vishnudevananda Saraswati/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 20:48, 30 August 2021 (UTC)


 * Many thanks for taking this on. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:56, 31 August 2021 (UTC)

Comments
 * Any reason that "guru" reference needs to be in the lead? Can the claim not be made and referenced in the main body?
 * Done.
 * "Sivananda Yoga Teachers' Training Course, one of the first yoga teacher training programs in the West" is this mentioned in the main body?
 * Added.
 * "books The Complete Illustrated Book of Yoga" The doesn't appear to be part of the formal title.
 * It's printed on the book's cover, both in the edition on my shelf and on the first edition photo in the article.
 * Cool, should the article be moved then? The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 16:10, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
 * Maybe, but that's not for this page.
 * In our article, Rāja has a diacritic.
 * It shouldn't, the project avoids them, or we'd have vṛkṣāsana for tree pose all over the shop. But they pop up like mushrooms in the night.
 * Cool, should that article also be moved? The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 16:10, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
 * Maybe but that's not for this page.
 * "Sivananda." can you contextualise who this individual was?
 * Glossed and wikilinked.
 * "monk, in February 1949[2] and " comma after 1949.
 * Added.
 * Can we replace the "n.a."s in the File:Soorya Namaskar in Complete Illustrated Guide to Yoga.jpg non-free image with suitable justifications, "not applicable" is not acceptable.
 * Added.
 * "teach hatha yoga in " overlinked.
 * Fixed.
 * "rock group The Beatles to" the Beatles.
 * Done.
 * "and is said to have sold over a million copies" as of 1989?
 * Added.
 * "in 1959.[12][13] In 1961" bit repetitive.
 * Edited.
 * "he called into life" bit whimsical.
 * Edited.
 * "and intuitively chose" is "intuitively" really necessary?
 * Removed.
 * A lot of sentences in this para start "In (month) (year)". Bit repetitive.
 * Edited a bit.
 * "ashram" doesn't seem to be linked anywhere.
 * Linked in 'Early life and training'.
 * "he conducted peace flights" did he himself pilot these or was he a passenger? Did they literally just "fly" over things?
 * He flew himself. He literally overflew things like the Berlin Wall, yes.
 * "flew from" if indeed he did fly it himself, could you use "piloted his Peace Plane from..."?
 * Done.
 * West and East Berlin have separate articles.
 * Linked both.
 * Where are the two works referenced (after the Complete Illustrated... one)?
 * I'd have thought listing these in 'Works' was sufficient really. There's no indication they achieved specially remarkable sales or anything like that.
 * How do we verify they exist? The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 16:10, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
 * Added ISBNs/OCLC.
 * Ref 31, spaced hyphens should be en-dashes.
 * Fixed.
 * Ideally ISBN's in consistent format.
 * converted ISBN-10.

That's all I have here. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 09:33, 31 August 2021 (UTC)
 * Many thanks, all done. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:40, 31 August 2021 (UTC)