Talk:Who Am I? (Pale Waves album)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 20:29, 8 September 2021 (UTC)

Comments
 * "the band members Ciara" reiterate Pale Waves here as this is the first para of the main body so it's fair to just link the band at this point.
 * Done!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "(Heather Baron-..." never a fan of completely parenthesised sentences, good for a footnote.
 * Done!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "nevertheless traumatic" according to whom?
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "also had a significant impact on the release of the album" why? Digital releases were fine?
 * That's a good question! The source is not crystal clear, but I think it was logistics related to recording and touring. It seems that the pandemic forced them to record virtually and torpedoed a possibility of a tour, so they bumped it all back a bit. But that's a guess on my part.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:48, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * " think the first batch of demos" this is a huuuuge quote. What's the really significant part?  Can it be trimmed down just a little?
 * I snipped it down a bit. How is it looking now?-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:43, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "told Coup de Main that " what's that?
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "So important was Luck..." there are a few direct quotes hereafter, they should really be inline cited immediately after each quote.
 * Fixed! I usually do that, but some people complain that it's overlinking. More than happy to oblige here.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "Baron-Gracie told NME, "I know" NME is overlinked.
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "in Los Angeles, California as Baron" comma after Cali.
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "Heather Baron-Gracie and Ciara Doran" unless there's any chance of ambiguity, no need to repeat first names.
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "with NME magazine " overlinked. And no need to explain here it's a magazine.
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "Promotion and singles" descends into proseline. Try making a couple of engaging paragraphs out of those factoids.
 * I can probably add some info about the videos, but for right now, I collapsed them down into two paragraphs, which seems to look OK.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:39, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "Smith of NME magazine' see above.
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * "emo pop" link?
 * Link added.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * Accolades table doesn't need to be sortable. Just one entry.
 * Fixed!-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * " the Official Physical Albums Charts (OOC), the" overlinked, and how does OOC work??
 * It seems that those are linked automatically. Or are you referring to the in-text instances?-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:34, 10 September 2021 (UTC)
 * Spaced hyphens in the following refs should be en-dashes: 33, 39, 41, 45.
 * These should be patched up now.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:35, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * All time ranges e.g. 10:23-11:59 need to be en-dashes.
 * Fixed.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:38, 10 September 2021 (UTC)


 * Are you linking websites/publishers first time, all times, randomly? What's the strategy?
 * It should be upon first mention. I think I cleaned that up a bit, at least in the main body text.-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:38, 10 September 2021 (UTC)

That's all I have. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 20:16, 9 September 2021 (UTC)
 * How does this all look now?-- Gen. Quon   (Talk)  00:49, 10 September 2021 (UTC)