Talk:Will P. Brady/GA2

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Iazyges (talk · contribs) 22:26, 19 September 2021 (UTC)

Criteria
GA Criteria:
 * 1
 * 1.a   ✅
 * 1.b   ✅
 * 2
 * 2.a   ✅
 * 2.b   ✅
 * 2.c   ✅
 * 2.d   ✅
 * 3
 * 3.a   ✅
 * 3.b   ✅
 * 4
 * 4.a   ✅
 * 5
 * 5.a   ✅
 * 6
 * 6.a   ✅
 * 6.b   ✅
 * No DAB links   ✅
 * No dead links   ✅
 * No missing citations
 * Brady also heard cases in November and December 1917. needs a citation, although the citations from the note should be easily applicable to the sentence itself.
 * Do you think citations are necessary here? I didn't include them because there are five in the footnote, which covers the exact same ground (just in more detail)—figured we could avoid repeating some references. But if you think they're needed, I'll add one for November and one for December.

Prose Suggestions
Please note that almost all of these are suggestions, and can be implemented or ignored at your discretion. Any changes I deem necessary for the article to pass GA standards I will bold.

Lede

 * Brady was born to a pioneering Austin family and grew up there. suggest Brady was born in Austin to a pioneering family and raised there.
 * In the second phrasing it's not clear whether the family was a pioneering family that happened to be in Austin at the time, or whether they were Austin pioneers.


 * An older brother, John W. Brady, also became a Texas lawyer and judge; a niece, Caroline Brady, would go on to become a philologist. suggest removing this as not important enough for the lede.
 * Maybe not strictly necessary, but they're pretty interesting articles.


 * Governor Thomas Mitchell Campbell. suggest Texas Governor Thomas Mitchell Campbell.
 * Done.


 * as the state president of the Catholic Knights of America. clarify which state, Texas or California.
 * Done.

Early life and education

 * He was the uncle of the philologist Caroline Brady. either the section should be renamed "early life and family", or this should be moved to the private life section.
 * I get your point, although I think it fits a bit better here, and have trimmed a bit of the family information. I prefer the header "Early life and education," which I use almost universally in biographies.

Education

 * The following year Brady took a three-week vacation that included stops in Buffalo and New York City I'm not really sure this belongs in the article unless it's somehow related to his job as an educator, or some other event of his life.
 * It's a minor point, although I think this information (along with the post-law school trip) gives a slight sense of Brady's means and worldview.


 * As superintendent, Brady's duties included reviewing transfers and expulsions of students. He was also involved in the hiring of instructors suggest As superintendent, Brady's duties included reviewing transfers and expulsions of students, as well as the hiring of instructors
 * Done.

Law

 * It included an abstract office which claimed to have complete abstracts of all of Reeves, Loving, and Winkler counties explain what an abstract is somewhere.
 * Abstract is linked to property abstract, which should do the trick.

District attorney

 * 1909 Governor Thomas Mitchell Campbell suggest 1909 Texas Governor Thomas Mitchell Campbell
 * Done.

County judge

 * He joined the law firm of Stafford and Mahan, which renamed itself Stafford, Brady & Mahan and took offices in the First National bank building did they only take these offices after he joined? If so, suggest mentioning they moved there from wherever they previously resided, such as He joined the law firm of Stafford and Mahan, which renamed itself Stafford, Brady & Mahan and moved its offices to the First National bank building from [x] if not, suggest He joined the law firm of Stafford and Mahan, which was located in the First National bank building, and subsequently renamed itself Stafford, Brady & Mahan.
 * Changed to "moved its offices to," although I haven't been able to find where they were beforehand.


 * with some 3,000 civil and 800 criminal cases suggest with some 3,000 civil and 800 criminal cases pending
 * Done.


 * and at another appeared in support of Texas representative R. Ewing Thomason. suggest and at another appeared in support of Texas representative R. Ewing Thomason, a Democrat.
 * Done.

Oil

 * Suggest renaming section to "Oil interests".
 * Preferences vary, but I try to keep section headers short, e.g., "Law," "Oil," and "Politics."

Later years

 * Suggest mentioning their deaths here, or else in a new, "Death" section following, rather than in personal life.
 * I see where you're coming from, although later years is a subsection of "Career," so I don't think it makes sense to deal with the deaths here.

Social life

 * In this capacity he met with members of the Gould and Texas & Pacific lines suggest In this capacity he met with members of the Gould and Texas & Pacific railroad lines
 * Done.

Personal life

 * having moved there with her parents when young. suggest having moved there with her parents while young.
 * Changed.


 * through the south and visit Brady's relatives in Arizona believe "the South" should be capitalized here.
 * Already addressed by you.


 * Will Brady took a home on Fort Boulevard, suggest Will Brady bought a home on Fort Boulevard,
 * The source says that "Mr. and Mrs. W. P. Brady, recently of Pecos, Texas, have taken a home on Fort Boulevard." I suspect that they rented, given that he bought land and had a house built shortly thereafter.