Talk:William Beanes/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Eddie891 (talk · contribs) 21:21, 4 October 2020 (UTC)

Will review, shortly. Eddie891 Talk Work 21:21, 4 October 2020 (UTC)Q
 * Comments
 * Hi, sorry it's taken so long for me to comment here. life got in the way. Eddie891 Talk Work 01:33, 21 October 2020 (UTC)


 * Saving lede for last, other comments follow the article chronologically


 * "and the second generation with this family name" strikes me as superfluous detail
 * ✅ Removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:09, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "He was the third generation with the Scottish family name in America and one of the second generation of the family born in America. " I think this is unneeded
 * ✅ Removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:13, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "third generation with the family name born in America and the fourth Scottish descendant in America with the Beanes family nam" same... It can probably be inferred
 * ✅ Removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:22, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "They had a son named William," clarify that this is the william who's the subject. Additionally, you don't cite his birth daate in the article
 * ✅ Removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:22, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "in a comfortable rural environment" do you think you could rephrase this? What does 'a comfortable rural environment refer to?
 * ✅ Reworded. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:38, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "He became" clarify if, as it presumably means, you are referring to Hanson.
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:52, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * I think you can trim some of the detail about John Hanson, because it's really about John and not William.
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:52, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "Boston's position" which was?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:19, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "put into effect the" just in the county or in the nation?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:34, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "distinguished scientist with an excellent reputation" is there any substance to this? What does 'scientist' mean here? What about 'excellent reputation?
 * ✅ Extra references provided with quotes. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:20, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "and his son" Beanes' son or Archer's?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:49, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "in the Chesapeake Bay area of Maryland" imho unneeded
 * ✅ Removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:49, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * Where were all the other inhabitants of Upper Marlboro? If the source doesn't specify, that's fine.
 * ✅ Researched and sources don't say. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:15, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "and that it had perhaps been a ruse" can you rephrase this a little bit?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:32, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "undue vehemence" can you be a little more specific here?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:15, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "Ross and Cockburn soon released Bowie and the others" do we know why
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:15, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "appointed by fourth President James Madison" needed?
 * ✅ Removed. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:15, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "came across the" presumably they 'reached' the ship rather than just happening upon it?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "who refused to release Beanes" do we know why?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "Skinner knew Beanes had a good reputation" value?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "reputation. He collected letters " who does he refer to
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * "sail back to Baltimore, but held " missing word?
 * ✅ Copy edited accordingly. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * I've lightly ce'd, please check that the changes are agreeable to you.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


 * Given that there's such a paucity of biographical information on Beanes, how would you feel about re-purposing this into an article on the Writing of the Star Spangled Banner? I don't think it would take much work, mostly the lede, but also understand there's a case to be made for keeping the article as is. Let me know what you think, please. I'm fine either way. Nice work on this interesting topic. Eddie891 Talk Work 01:33, 21 October 2020 (UTC)
 * I considered your proposal and after much thought on it came to the conclusion that I think I would rather stick with the biography on William Beanes. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:57, 21 October 2020 (UTC)
 * That works for me, thanks for considering it. Cheers- Eddie891 Talk Work 11:17, 21 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Read over your comments and thinking them over now on how to answer each one. Will mark Done after I have addressed each of your comments.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:57, 21 October 2020 (UTC)
 * All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:31, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

Misc

 * Images are good
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:40, 23 October 2020 (UTC)


 * Sources look good, but formatting for newspaper articles is wonky. Did you use Newspapers.com? If so, I recommend adding links to the clippings. Otherwise, they are fine as is
 * ✅ - I did not put those in the article. I believe in properly citing news clippings and providing link. I use Newspaper.com alot, as you might have already noticed. Fixed those news references with proper cites where applicable. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:40, 23 October 2020 (UTC)


 * Earwigs has a pretty high percent, but that looks almost definitely like a mirror
 * ✅ yes, mirror. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:40, 23 October 2020 (UTC)


 * spotcheck to come... Eddie891 Talk Work 15:55, 23 October 2020 (UTC)
 * These further points addressed. Can you look again please. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:40, 23 October 2020 (UTC)
 * User:Eddie891 These further points addressed. Can you look again please. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:55, 27 October 2020 (UTC)


 * Spotcheck
 * I don't know that source 11 is enough to substantiate 'some historians', when it merely looks like an ad
 * ✅ - removed this line, as I couldn't find additional references for this.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:35, 28 October 2020 (UTC)


 * other sourcing lines up
 * you never cite the date of death in the article body AFAICS = He died there on October 12, 1828
 * And that's-- at long last-- it from here Eddie891 Talk Work 21:52, 28 October 2020 (UTC)
 * LGTM Eddie891 Talk Work 15:32, 29 October 2020 (UTC)