Talk:Zagreb Resolution/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 16:40, 16 October 2021 (UTC)

I will be taking a look at this! —  Ghost River  16:40, 16 October 2021 (UTC)

Lede

 * "as continuation of" "as a continuation of"
 * "the conference held in Zagreb on 2–3 March" "the Zagreb conference that March."

Background

 * Missing closing en dash after "and the Muslim Slavs (Bosniaks)"
 * There's a lot going on in this clause and I'm wondering if there would be some way to split it: objections of Croat political leaders to division of the proposed Triune Kingdom to Croatia-Slavonia and the Kingdom of Dalmatia assigned to the Hungarian-dominated Lands of the Crown of Saint Stephen and Cisleithania respectively.
 * " the Russia sued for peace"
 * "May of 1917" "May 1917" per MOS:BADDATE
 * Comma after "in the Austrian Imperial Council"

Zagreb conference

 * "There were 43 people attending the conference," "The conference boasted 43 attendees"
 * "Slovenes, Croats and Serbs is unified" "Slovenes, Croats and Serbs are unified"
 * No comma needed after "The first point of the resolution"
 * "and was used in the Niš Declaration."
 * "historcally" "historically"

Aftermath

 * 17 August the Slovene National Council (Narodni svet) in Ljubljana on 17 August. muddled syntax
 * "The main challenges for the preparatory committee was to obtain cooperation of the HSK which refused to cooperate, convince that the project was directed against the HSK." "The main challenge for the preparatory committee was to obtain cooperation from the HSK, who were convinced that the project was directed against them."
 * "declared severing" "declared the severance"
 * "and joining of the State" "and joined the State"

General comments

 * Map and photos are properly licensed and relevant
 * No stability concerns in the revision history
 * Earwig score looks good at 9.1%

All minor prose things. Putting on hold for now, and feel free to ping me with questions! —  Ghost River  17:25, 16 October 2021 (UTC)

Thank you for taking time to review this nomination. I have reviewed and implemented your suggestions. I have also edited the sentence containing repeated date (on establishment of the Narodni svet) and broken up the confusingly long sentence in the Background section you pointed out. Could you please have another look at those edits? Cheers--Tomobe03 (talk) 17:49, 16 October 2021 (UTC)
 * Everything looks good now; happy to pass! —  Ghost River  16:54, 17 October 2021 (UTC)