Template:Did you know nominations/Half of Me

Quoting and hook issues

Half of Me

 * ... that Scottish recording artist Emeli Sandé co-wrote Rihanna's song "Half of Me"?
 * Reviewed: Hubert von Goisern

Created/expanded by Tomica (talk), Calvin999 (talk). Nominated by Tomica (talk) at 23:49, 28 November 2012 (UTC)


 * Article

New – created within five days of nomination, Long enough – the prose portion is at least 1500 characters,  Within policy – meets core policies and guidelines, and in particular: is neutral, cites sources with inline citations, and is free of copyright violations and plagiarism. Please review the quoted text and verify that all are faithful to the source cited. I did find "The disc risks more ballads than usual. A hidden track at the end, 'Half Of Me', proves the star can be as evocative as she is provocative." to require modification to account for the missing prose between 'ballads than usual'. and 'A hidden track'. Use either. . . in between, or break it down to two quotes, joined by running prose. Also this quote: ". . .ex-boyfriend Chris Brown have made her a tabloid fixture and a global celebrity. She also wrote that on the song she sounds wounded." should end after "global celebrity." because all after is commentary and no longer a faithful quote.


 * Hook

Format – less than 200 characters and meets the formatting guidelines: Content, is marginally interesting; the article lends itself to numerous hooks marginally more interesting, IMO; the current hook is accurate and facts are cited with an inline citation, it is neutral and does not focus unduly on negative aspects of living people. Is the article at the correct title? The majority of wp:rs seems to have the song as "Half Of Me". I'd like a comment from another reviewer regarding this.


 * Other

QPQ – nominators who have more than five DYK credits and are nominating their own articles must review another article. Image used in article is free and properly licensed.


 * The article is well written, and the product of a fine collaboration. Teeth will not gnash when this hook is on the main page, IMO. -- My 76 Strat  (talk)  10:15, 13 December 2012 (UTC)


 * Symbol question.svg There are issues that still need to be addressed, so the final symbol should be this one until they are settled. I would like to ask the reviewer to please use only one symbol per review, to indicate the final "grade". Many thanks. About a couple of your question-mark icons: Wikipedia style affects article naming and song titles, among other things, so "Half of Me", with the lowercase "of", follows WP:MOS and is indeed correct. I do agree that a more interesting hook should be devised. Also, note that on Wikipedia, ellipses do not have interior spaces, but instead have a space immediately before and after: " ... ". BlueMoonset (talk) 17:48, 13 December 2012 (UTC)
 * Thank you for that insight. I'll certainly incorporate your thoughtful counsel moving forward. Cheers. -- My 76 Strat  (talk)  19:19, 13 December 2012 (UTC)
 * ALT1... that according to Christina Lee of Idolator, the line "You saw me on a television" from the song "Half of Me" by Rihanna, refers to the singer's interview with Oprah Winfrey? — Tomíca (T2ME) 16:00, 19 December 2012 (UTC)


 * BlueMoonset, this isn't "Interesting you know?", it's "Did you know?". While I agree that hooks should grab the attention of readers, there isn't always information which is so different to everything else. "Half of Me" is a bonus track, not as many people comment on them. Both of these hooks are fine. AARON &bull; TALK   21:39, 20 December 2012 (UTC)


 * Aaron, ALT1 isn't fine at all: Lee was speculating that the lyric might refer to Oprah: "Maybe it was even ...". Stating it as if it were fact rather than one reviewer's flight of fancy is simply wrong; I've struck ALT1 because of these issues. Further, there are problems with the quotes from the Lee article: not only is too much quoted rather than paraphrased, in my view, but the last part includes words that Lee didn't write, which is very bad. This misquoting issue needs to be fixed immediately, as does then one noted by My76Strat above in the first line of Critical reception. Under the circumstances, you or Tomica should review all the quotes to make sure there aren't any other inaccuracies beyond these two we've identified.


 * Please don't forget that "Did you know" hooks are supposed to be interesting. A hook should include something interesting about the new (or newly expanded) article being nominated: that's the DNA of DYK. As WP:DYK 3a says, "The hook should include a definite fact that is mentioned in the article and interesting to a broad audience." A possibility for improving the hookiness of the original hook might be this ALT2:
 * ALT2: ... that Rihanna's song "Half of Me" was co-written by Scottish recording artist Emeli Sandé, a Naughty Boy, and a StarGate?
 * You'll be a better judge as to whether it's reasonable to use the Naughty Boy and StarGate names in this context, but they add interest and a curiosity factor for people who don't know of them. (I've gone back and forth between "a StarGate" and "a dual StarGate"; if you think this would work in general, you can decide which is most appropriate and supportable.) BlueMoonset (talk) 20:16, 22 December 2012 (UTC); revised 20:24, 22 December 2012 (UTC)

I've been less available than normal, since after doing this review. Looking at the article history shows essentially no edits to the article since my review, which is clear indication that this hook should not be promoted further. BlueMoonset advocated these corrections earlier and still nothing. The issue is non-negotiable. This hook can not advance as is. I'd be less concerned about alt 2 and 3, until after the article is fixed. Seriously, -- My 76  Strat  (talk) 08:07, 24 December 2012 (UTC)