Template:Did you know nominations/Kojo Tovalou Houénou

Kojo Tovalou Houénou

 * ... that Kojo Tovalou Houénou became one of the main critics of French colonialism in Africa after he was kicked out of a Paris nightclub at the request of American tourists who objected to an African being served?
 * Reviewed: Derek Dietrich
 * Comment: If checking the source for the hook, Verges doesn't show that page in Google Books version, but Amazon has look inside function and if you search for Kojo you can see that relevant page. See: here.  Hope that helps.

Created/expanded by AbstractIllusions (talk). Self nom at 17:54, 14 December 2012 (UTC)




 * Symbol possible vote.svg I'm afraid the hook is too long. At least 11 characters should be removed. I hope this will be addressed because the hook is interesting, as is the article. The article is otherwise new enough, long enough and well-sourced. Surtsicna (talk) 20:20, 14 December 2012 (UTC)
 * ALT1: ... that Kojo Tovalou Houénou became a prominent critic of French colonialism in Africa after being kicked out of a Paris club by American tourists who objected to an African being served?
 * Tightened. 185 characters now and still consistent with Verges source. Thank you. AbstractIllusions (talk) 20:40, 14 December 2012 (UTC)
 * Symbol confirmed.svg It is fine now. It could be further shortened by replacing "after he was" with "after being", but it is not a requirement. Cheers, Surtsicna (talk) 20:55, 14 December 2012 (UTC)
 * Changed ALT1 to "after being". It sounds better regardless of tightening. Thanks for the suggestion. AbstractIllusions (talk) 21:43, 14 December 2012 (UTC)
 * Symbol possible vote.svg ALT1 is not accurate, assuming the article is. Houénou was attacked by the Americans, not kicked out; it was the French nightclub owner who kicked him out. (It doesn't make sense that American tourists could kick someone out of a French club, which is why I checked in the first place.) The American physical assault is the hook here, though the subsequent French removal ties in well with the criticism of French colonialism. I've struck the original overlong hook and the inaccurate ALT1; looking forward to an ALT2. However, please be sure to add inline source citations after each of the two sentences in the body of the article that describe the incident, even if they are the same as a later source in the paragraph: this is required by DYK rules. Also, as these are not online sources that can be directly verified, the gray tick should be used rather than the green one, to indicate that the sources were not checked directly, but a good faith assumption is made that they are accurately depicted and properly paraphrased. BlueMoonset (talk) 16:23, 16 December 2012 (UTC)
 * ALT2: ... that Kojo Tovalou Houénou became a prominent critic of French colonialism in Africa after being kicked out of a Paris club after being attacked by Americans who objected to an African being served?
 * Alright, so added clearer sourcing in the article for each sentence of the discussion. Added Washington Post source to the claim that the owner did the formal ejection. Alt 2 is shortened version of original (197 characters) with most significant cut being the shortening of the "American tourists" to simply "Americans." Like most fights, who know what really happened, but this is what the Verges and Washington Post sources do agree on. Let me know if it needs further fixes. AbstractIllusions (talk) 17:47, 16 December 2012 (UTC)
 * ALT3: ... that Kojo Tovalou Houénou became a prominent critic of French colonialism in Africa after being ejected from a Paris club where he was attacked by Americans who objected to an African being served?
 * I reinstated the required formatting (omitted from ALT2), and recast slightly to avoid a repetition of "after being"; the size remains 197 characters. Let me know whether you think this works. Since it's key to the hook, there really needs to be a cite in the article after "Houénou was attacked by Americans who were angered by the presence of an African in the club.", even if it's the same source as the one given a sentence later. Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 22:36, 16 December 2012 (UTC)
 * ALT3 looks good. Source added to key sentence. Thank you. AbstractIllusions (talk) 23:20, 16 December 2012 (UTC)
 * Pictogram voting keep.svg Great! Thanks for all the work. Since the only difference between ALT2 and ALT3 was formatting and non-fact-changing minor rephrasing, I feel I can safely restore the approval for this despite "writing" ALT3, since the hook is now supported by inline source citations at every point—offline sources accepted in good faith. New article created December 12, 2012, contains 10253 prose characters, remainder approved per Surtsicna review above. BlueMoonset (talk) 23:43, 16 December 2012 (UTC)