User:143737k/sandbox

Reply to Peer Review #2

Hello,

Thank you for the in depth feed back I am aware this article needs a lot of work its been challenging having to rewrite the entire article. I tried to stick to the original roughly but I see now that much of the original framework and info is inaccurate as well as some of my research. I will focus mainly on improving the accuracy of the data, I forgot you cant use other Wikipedia pages will definitely fix that. Thanks for the primary sources I will definitely check those out. Finding information for this topic has been challenging as almost all searches show articles and journals on the "Adoption of Rome" as opposed to adoption in Rome. I will make sure to justify all info in the adoption of women section and fix all the other comments.

Cheers,

143737K

Annotated Bibliography

Source 1 Augustus (old source but seems like a good source)

McDermott, William C. (1938). "Augustus". The Classical Weekly. 32 (4): 41–46. doi:10.2307/4340381. ISSN 1940-641X.

This article goes in depth about Augustus notably the most famous adopted Roman/Person to have ever lived. This text talks about many of the great achievements of Augustus as well as how he his political standing within Rome.

Source 2 Adoption laws (good source)

Coulanges, Numa Denis Fustel de (2012-03-14). The Ancient City: A Study of the Religion, Laws, and Institutions of Greece and Rome. Courier Corporation. ISBN 978-0-486-14235-7.

This article takes a wider look at laws and religion within ancient Rome and Greece. One section is entirely dedicated to adoption due to the importance to ancient Roman families. This article also touches on the pillars and the laws that were listed on them.

Source 3 Lucius Aemilius (good source. but information is missing in the citation)

Weigel, Richard D. (1978). "A Note on P. Lepidus". Classical Philology. 73 (1): 42–45. ISSN 0009-837X.

P Lepidus was a famous Roman who was known for giving up many of his children for adoption to one of the wealthiest political houses. Additionally when he died he had no children of his own but despite this his estate and will were giving to his children who legally were no longer his. (I think that Adopted kids could normally inherit both from their adoptive and natural parents in ancient Rome, but I could be wrong. This is good information, why was it not included in the article?)

Source 4: Course Text (good source)

Ancient Roman Civilization: History and Sources: 753 BCE to 640 CE. Oxford, New York: Oxford University Press. 2018-09-14. ISBN 978-0-19-084960-3.

The course text has many different sources of info that I will be using for reference throughout this article. Provides a very strong and diverse source of information.

Source 5 Publius Clodius Pulcher (good source)

Connerty, Victor (2000). Tatum, W. J. (ed.). "Publius Clodius Pulcher". The Classical Review. 50 (2): 514–516. ISSN 0009-840X.

Publius is known for his famous legal case where he seeks to gain control of the Plebs to overthrow Cicero. To do this he gets adopted by a Plebian much younger than himself something which was questionably legal at the time but thanks to the Consul it was pushed forward. Following this now legally a Pleb he advanced to sitting on the Tribune of the Plebs until his demise when seeking more power during the election for Consulship.

Source 6 Tacitus, Tiberius and Augustus (good source but it says that information in the citation is needed)

Cowan, Eleanor (2009-10). "Tacitus, Tiberius and Augustus". Classical Antiquity. 28 (2): 179–210. doi:10.1525/CA.2009.28.2.179. ISSN 0278-6656.

This article talks about three famous Romans who were adopted. Each of the three had very different stories and different issues with the Adoption but it shows us how adoption in Rome basically functioned.

'Source 7: seems like an old source but a good source. may be out of date. check with Dr. Gardner.'

'Source 8: I'd check with Dr. Gardner to See that the Adoption in Ancient Rome site is an acceptable site. no hyper link so I'd email it to her/see her in person about a numbe rof these issues.'

'Sources 9-10: These are Wikipedia Sources. These should be entirely removed. immediately.'

'''Had to re write entire Article due to Many sections were just copied off of other sites. Really going to rework this entire article will be adding in many more citations to get this up to a comfortable level.'''

'''Hi Peer Reviewer number 2 I have made some major changes i writing to make this article easier to read. Added many citation to help improve the quality and legitimacy of the info and have an image ready to import into the final section. The section of female adoption is new as there was very little info on the topic.'''

'Hi 143737k. This is PolluxMariusPetrus. There are a number of things that I need to bring to your attention. There are a number of issues so i would recommend making a list on paper as you look through every highlighted part in your article and annotated Bibliography so that nothing is missed. some are quite serious.'

1) The most concerning of all of these are the sources used. Wikipedia is NOT an acceptable source for a Wikipedia article (I recommend going to the citations in the original article for finding sources there) and what is more i see absolutely NO primary sources being used in your article (works by Roman Authors like Tacitus, Livy etc etc etc) I would speak to Dr. Gardner about this, especially as your section on women uses Wikipedia as it's exclusive source. I have also reviewed your annotated Bibliography with comments. some of the citations need more information. You should also considering re running your sources by Dr. Gardner.

2) Some of the information here is simply not factual. For example, Augustus did not take the throne from Julius Caesar as such. I highlighted areas of concern.

3) I noticed a number of wordy sentences, some of which do not make sense. again I highlighted where they are.

4) There are quite a few grammatical errors as well.

5) There is a chunk of information that is not even relevant to the topic in a few places (what does Livia's political career have to do with her being adopted...assuming that the source you used (wikipedia is accurate)

6) I will assume that the picture you intend to add is good, that being said I recommend chatting with Dr. Gardner first.

There are also a number of other issues I noticed so please read through and take some notes.

'Over all I found it a rather hard read with questionable sources and in some cases inaccurate information. I like your attempt to add a section on the adoption of women, but the research done for it is rather poor. I strongly recommend talking to Dr. Gardner as soon as possible about this.'

= Adoption in ancient Rome =

Adoption in Ancient Rome was frequently (generalization. delete word) practiced and performed by the upper classes; a large number of adoptions were performed by the Senatorial class. (Citation is a recent publication and good but if you look below it says it needs more information) Succession and family legacy were very important; therefore Romans needed ways of passing down their fortune and name when unable to produce a male heir. (citation needed?) Adoption was the only ( generalization? only?) way to guarantee succession, so it became a norm to adopt young males into the homes of high ranking families. (citation?) Due to the Roman inheritance laws (Falcidia Lex), (consider moving citation to end of sentence. also consider using other source, maybe mathisen?) women had very little rights or the ability to inherit fortunes. This made them less valuable for adoption. (citation?) However, women were still adopted and it was more common for them to be wed to an influential family. (citation?)

Contents

 * 1Causes
 * 2Practice
 * 3Imperial succession
 * 4See also
 * 5References
 * 6External links

Causes[edit]
Additionally, (remove word) one of the benefits of a male heir was the ability to create ties among other high-ranking families through marriage. Senators throughout Rome had the responsibility of producing sons who could inherit their family’s title and estate. Childbirth was so unpredictable during these times and there was no way of knowing gender before birth. This caused many children to be lost in the years directly after and (it) was hard for the senators to control the situation. With the cost of children being high and average families having very few children, this posed a challenge to the (remove "the") Senators. Without a male heir, their title and estate could be forfeited. This was the leading cause for adoption in ancient Rome. However, (remove "However") it is important to note that adoption has been used for a variety of reasons;' ( what are those variety of reasons?)'' many among them drastically different from this Adoption was a guaranteed way of assuring a son; this gave senators the freedom to produce children more openly. (This sentence does not make sense. reword.) They no longer feared a female baby because the  child could be given away for adoption. (why would they fear female babies and more importantly, what does this have to do with adoption? why mention the fear of female children at all?) Additionally, (remove "additionally") there was now a lower risk of succession issues because male heirs could be married off to other high-ranking families to create powerful ties among the upper class. (is "married off" a term that can be used for men? how would creating powerful ties help succession issues? reword sentence. it's wordy and unclear)''' In the case of the lower classes, raising a large family was quite challenging. Due to the cost, this allowed them to put their children up for adoption. It would benefit both the families and the child. One famous example of this is when Lucius Aemilius put his own two sons up for adoption. (maybe you could provide more of his story? sounds interesting. why not put it here?) (With men holding the spotlight in history books and articles, it is possible that adoption of girls was more popular. However, because most of the famous adoptions were male children, female adoptions could have been wrongfully accounted. Additionally, because the legal impacts of women in ancient Rome were so minimal, it is possible that adoptions could have been more informal and therefore less accounted for in history. '(interesting theory. but it's uncited. also, might this be better put under the section "Adoption of women" ???)'

Practice[edit]
In Rome, the rule and designation of adoption (what is "the rule and designation of adoption"? unclear) was given to the paterfamilias.(what's a paterfamilias?) Adoption would result in an equalization of power for the adopted child (what's that? unclear) as the status (what's the status? clarify what you mean) of the adopting family was immediately transferred to the child. This was almost always an '''improvement in power due to the high cost of adoption. (maybe new word for "improvement in power." maybe "increase"? what about the High cost of adoption? how was that significant?) However, (remove "However")''' Publius Clodius Pulcher (move citation?) famously used this loophole for political power. (how?) '''During the Roman Republic, the same laws stood in place with only one difference; the requirement of the Senate's approval. As the political structure shifted, the rules regarding approval of adoption also shifted.''' (citation needed and how? consider removing "As the political structure shifted, the rules regarding approval of adoption also shifted.")

The actual adoption that took place operated more like a wedding or a business contract that we would know today. (how is it like a wedding or a especially a business contract? unclear.) The adopted child took the family name as his own. Along with this, the child kept his/her original name through the form of cognomen or essentially a nickname. The adopted child also maintained previous family connections and often leveraged this politically. Due to the power disparity that normally existed between the families involved in adoption, a fee was often given to the lower family to help with replacing (in most cases) the first-born son. Another case similar to adoption was the fostering of children; this effectively took place when a paterfamilias transferred his power to another man to be left in their care.

Adoption of women[edit] (see important note at the bottom)
Throughout Roman history many adoptions took place but very few accounts of female adoption were recorded and preserved throughout history. One of the most well know was Livia Augusta who gained this name after her adoption into the Julian family. (wasn't she awarded this title on account of Being Octavian's wife?) Known mainly as the wife of Augustus. '''Livia played a key role during this time in the Roman Empire both as a political symbol and a role model for Roman households. Livia earned herself an honorable place among history as a great mother however some of the rumors related to potential heirs have survived throughout history'''. (what does any of this have to do with adoption?)

Claudia Octavia was another well know adopted women in ancient Rome. Claudia was adopted by Claudius during his reign in 40 CE as his first and only daughter. Several years into adoption Claudius adopted Nero and arranged for the two to wed in 53 CE, this made Claudia Octavia both Nero's step sister and first wife. Claudia was banished in later years on the account of adultery with Anicetus, after her death her head was cut off and sent to Poppaea bringing much sorrow to Rome. (what does this have to do with adoption?)

(IMPORTANT NOTE: The above section is the section that you used Wikipedia as a source for exclusively. That is not an acceptable source. You need to either find other sources for this information or else delete the entire section. Consider looking at the Wikipedia page you cited her for their original sources. This section is the crown Jewel of your work (as you added this entire section single-handedly) and you should try to retain it. That being said, you still need to find a source(s) to replace Wikipedia.)

Imperial succession[edit]
Many of Rome’s famous emperors entered ( use "took") the throne through adoption (use a comma) because this was one of the few ways to avoid conflict. Among these men were Tactis Tiberius and Augustus, to name a few. Given the proven effectiveness, for a long period of time, emperors would simply adopt an heir to the throne. '''However, this wasn't always as easy as it may have seemed, because of the many challenges of becoming an emperor. (try saying something like, "this did not mean that there were never challenges to the Imperial succession.) It became difficult for Augustus when his uncle Julius Caesar was assassinated and he needed to claim the throne before anyone else tried to take over . Augustus was only 19 and had never served in battle; his age was holding him back . Even more troubling were Antony's attempts to take over through political scandal. With Antony controlling all of Caesar's previous powers, Augustus had few options. Very little power and his age helped Augustus decide to wait out the current turmoil and prepare for a future role within Rome. ''(useful information, but Julius Caesar was not an Emperor. Find another example. also you use words like "troubling" which is not neutral, you use numerals for "19" write "nineteen" instead, and the phrase "It became difficult" is bad grammar and "claim the throne" is not accurate for this time period. Find another example and try to improve your grammar.)'

After Augustus's death finding an heir was very challenging much of this due to the use of adoption. (it was made difficult due to adoption? Adoption is what made it possible as he had no direct male line heirs in his bloodline. the opposite is true) You can see this clearly in Augustus's family tree with many families being woven together(Going to insert Picture Here https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c0/JulioClaudian.svg/1000px-JulioClaudian.svg.png). (I am not an expert on this one, but I recommend showing this picture to Dr. Gardner to ensure that it is not copyrighted or violates Wikipedia standards in some other way.) This lead to some unique situations such as his successor Tiberius who was both Augustus's step son and son in law. (explain what the unique sitation is and how it continues? what continues. adopting distant relatives as your sons to ensure smooth successions?) This trend would continue with Caligula who was the great grandson of both Augustus and Mark Antony as well as the great nephew of Tiberius. Many of the following emperors were related to the bloodline in some manner until the adoption of Nero by Claudius during his reign, in 54 CE Nero became the second adopted emperor of Rome. (Nero was also a blood relation of Augustus by his mother but was adopted by his relative so he could be his heir. also uncited. delete)

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Final Copy

= Adoption in ancient Rome =

Adoption in Ancient Rome was practiced and performed by the upper classes; a large number of adoptions were performed by the Senatorial class. Succession and family legacy were very important; therefore Romans needed ways of passing down their fortune and name when unable to produce a male heir. Adoption was one of the only ways to guarantee succession, so it became a norm to adopt young males into the homes of high ranking families. Due to the Roman inheritance laws (Falcidia Lex), women had very little rights or the ability to inherit fortunes. This made them less valuable for adoption. However, women were still adopted and it was more common for them to be wed to an influential family.

Contents

 * 1Causes
 * 2Practice
 * 3Imperial succession
 * 4See also
 * 5References
 * 6External links

Causes[edit]
One of the benefits of a male heir was the ability to create ties among other high-ranking families through marriage. Senators throughout Rome had the responsibility of producing sons who could inherit their family’s title and estate. Childbirth was so unpredictable during these times and there was no way of knowing gender before birth. This caused many children to be lost in the years directly after and it was hard for the senators to control the situation. With the cost of children being high and average families having very few children, this posed a challenge for the Senators. Without a male heir, their title and estate could be forfeited. This was the leading cause for adoption in ancient Rome. I'''t is important to note that adoption in ancient Rome was used for a number of reasons and not exclusively by Senators. The use by Senators guaranteed them a son; this gave senators them freedom to produce children more freely knowing a male heir could always be adopted if unable to produce one naturally. This also created new benefits for female babies enabling them to be given away for adoption into higher ranked families. With the reduced risk of succession issues this created opportunities for males children to marry into other high-ranking families to create powerful ties among the upper class.''' In the case of the lower classes, raising a large family was quite challenging. Due to the cost, this allowed them to put their children up for adoption. It would benefit both the families and the child. One famous example of this is when Lucius Aemilius put his own two sons up for adoption.

Practice[edit]
In Rome, the person in charge of adoption was the male head of the household called the paterfamilias. Adoption would result in an adoption of power for the adopted child as the status of the adopting family was immediately transferred to the child. This was almost always an increase in power due to the high cost of adoption. Publius Clodius Pulcher famously used this loophole for political power in his attempt to gain control over the plebs. During the Roman Republic, the same laws stood in place with only one difference; the requirement of the Senate's approval.

The actual adoption was often operated like a business contract between the two families. The adopted child took the family name as his own. Along with this, the child kept his/her original name through the form of cognomen or essentially a nickname. The adopted child also maintained previous family connections and often leveraged this politically. Due to the power disparity that normally existed between the families involved in adoption, a fee was often given to the lower family to help with replacing (in most cases) the first-born son. Another case similar to adoption was the fostering of children; this effectively took place when a paterfamilias transferred his power to another man to be left in their care.

Adoption of women[edit] (see important note at the bottom)
Throughout Roman history many adoptions took place but very few accounts of female adoption were recorded and preserved throughout history. With men holding the spotlight in history books and articles, it is possible that adoption of girls was more popular. However, because most of the famous adoptions were male children, female adoptions could have been wrongfully accounted. Additionally, because the legal impacts of women in ancient Rome were so minimal, it is possible that adoptions could have been more informal and therefore less accounted for in history. One of the most well know was Livia Augusta who gained this name after her adoption into the Julian family. Known mainly as the wife of Augustus. '''Livia played a key role during this time in the Roman Empire both as a political symbol and a role model for Roman households. Livia earned herself an honorable place among history as a great mother however some of the rumors related to potential heirs have survived throughout history'''.

Claudia Octavia was another well know adopted women in ancient Rome. Claudia was adopted by Claudius during his reign in 40 CE as his first and only daughter. Several years into adoption Claudius adopted Nero and arranged for the two to wed in 53 CE, this made Claudia Octavia both Nero's step sister and first wife. Claudia was banished in later years on the account of adultery with Anicetus, after her death her head was cut off and sent to Poppaea bringing much sorrow to Rome. (what does this have to do with adoption?)

(IMPORTANT NOTE: The above section is the section that you used Wikipedia as a source for exclusively. That is not an acceptable source. You need to either find other sources for this information or else delete the entire section. Consider looking at the Wikipedia page you cited her for their original sources. This section is the crown Jewel of your work (as you added this entire section single-handedly) and you should try to retain it. That being said, you still need to find a source(s) to replace Wikipedia.)

Imperial succession[edit]
Many of Rome’s famous emperors took the throne through adoption, this was one of the few ways to avoid conflict. Among these men were Tactis Tiberius and Augustus, to name a few. Given the proven effectiveness, for a

long period of time, emperors would simply adopt an heir to the throne. However, this wasn't always as easy as it may have seemed, because of the many challenges of becoming an emperor. It was challenging for Augustus when his uncle Julius Caesar was assassinated, with his sights on the throne Augustus wanted the to claim it before anyone else tried to take over . '''Augustus was only nineteen and had never served in battle; his age was holding him back. Another issue for Augustus was Antony's attempts to take over through political scandal. With Antony controlling all of Caesar's previous powers, Augustus had few options. Very little power and his age helped Augustus decide to wait out the current turmoil and prepare for a future role within Rome.'''

After Augustus's death finding an heir was very challenging much of this due to the number of possible heirs. You can see this clearly in Augustus's family tree with many families being woven together through marriage and adoption. This lead to some complex situations such as his successor Tiberius who was both Augustus's step son and son in law. This trend would continue with Caligula who was the great grandson of both Augustus and Mark Antony as well as the great nephew of Tiberius. Many of the following emperors were related to the bloodline in some manner until the adoption of Nero by Claudius during his reign, in 54 CE Nero became the second adopted emperor of Rome.