User:ACreditableWorldHistoryTeacher/sandbox

The 23rd President of the United States of America: Funny Valentine

He was born on September 20, 1847. He was an American citizen born in an unspecified part of North Carolina. Throughout his life, he had served in the American Civil War for its' entirety. But after serving in the Civil War he was captured and tortured for many years making his back appear to be scarred in the shape of the American flag.

Valentine's foremost characteristic is his deep patriotism. Marked by the gruesome fate of his father,[8] Valentine's goal is that the United States stands over the rest of the world. To do so, he seeks the blessing of the Saint Corpse Parts, becoming ecstatic when the Corpse blesses him.[9] Moreover, the President shows a great degree of determination toward this goal. First acting through his subordinates, Valentine then takes a greater active part in seizing the Saint's Corpse, confronting his enemies personally if need be, and ultimately claiming that he has no problem putting his life on the line to fulfill his objectives. He also manages to regain his composure even facing the eternal torture that Tusk ACT4 has inflicted on him.[10] One of his expressed fears is to have someone petty or worse seizing the Corpse and taking away the happiness that should go into the United States.[11]

Despite this, Valentine is also callous about the lives of individual Americans, never hesitating to sacrifice his own subordinates in his quest for the Corpse[12] and going as far as to kill them himself if he deems it necessary.[13] He also cruelly trapped a train engineer halfway through a mirror just to assure himself on one advantage.[14] His patriotism also comes with some hypocritical egotism. Despite his declared goal of working for the interests of the country, he regularly declares that his goals are fulfilled and after witnessing Love Train's ability, shouted that everything, including power and glory, was now his.[9] Notably, when he was infatuated with Lucy Steel disguised as his wife, Valentine tried to rape her and declared that she would bear his child,[15] saying that he wanted a dynasty to ensure the United States would remain at the top (and by that mean disregarded the country's democratic roots).[16]

Valentine is a ruthless individual, having a might-makes-right attitude toward the world, constantly using the metaphor of "taking the napkin first" to signify his gain in power.[17] He thinks that power is founded on authority, and part of the reason he wants the Corpse is to obtain a spiritual authority on par with the Vatican. Convinced that not everyone's wishes can be fulfilled and one must always sacrifice something for the sake of another, Valentine chooses to put the United States' prerogatives above the interests of the rest of the world. Valentine respects ambition and ruthlessness and ultimately entrusts the Corpse to an alternate Diego Brando (Diego Brando from Another Universe.[18] On the other hand, he looks down on Steven Steel's less ambitious goals, calling his will superficial.[19] Claiming that his methods require the least sacrifices possible, they still liberally involve murder and generally violence, as well as manipulation of the people around him.

In and out of combat, Valentine shows a careful and observant side, regularly watching and thinking about the situation to best see his strengths and vulnerabilities. Firstly, he's made great care to disguise his search behind the Steel Ball Run race to leave rival countries behind[20] but also closely watched the race, following the racers inside a train and having an underling both stand watch within the participants or recruiting them afterward, or standing ready to ambush the duo. Valentine also understandably keeps tabs on the whereabouts of the Corpse Parts, which after killing Axl RO, allows him to deduce that the infiltrator who broke into his residence was still near him.[21] His observant nature makes him see through Diego Brando's disguise when the latter tries to approach him,[22] and suspect Gyro's determination in their clash that something is amiss,[23] fully grasping (with the help of a lucky wind gust) the danger the Spin poses to him and how it works.[24] However, when confronting Johnny, Valentine commits a fatal mistake in underestimating the Spin, conceitedly allowing Johnny a last "futile" attempt at shooting him.[25]

Valentine also demonstrates a generally dignified and composed attitude. In attitude, he is a polite man, among others using the formal and neutral pronoun "Watashi" (わたし) for himself, and almost never losing his composure enough to insult someone. He possesses a code of honor, first putting his patriotism above his own interests, and is a man of his words, never killing Steven Steel despite having reasons to, only because he swore an oath.[26] Valentine also respects the prowess of his adversaries, notably admiring the Spin technique as Ball Breaker tries to breach the dimensional wall.

Nonetheless, Valentine will twist this code whenever convenient and isn't above lying to gain an advantage, notably feeding Johnny with false hopes and half-truths to persuade him into releasing him from Tusk. He also isn't above some petty moments such as slamming one of his men into another dimension to get rid of him or stomping Steven Steel's wounds to make him suffer as frivolous revenge for him slightly thwarting his plans.[26] During his earlier appearances, Valentine emoted much more, slightly losing his cool on several occasions and also privately calling Diego a "peasant" for having the gall to negotiate with his person on the same level.

Funny Valentine is generally polite but cold toward any individual. The only person he's admitted to having loved is his father, confessing to have been searching for him across multiple universes, although that claim is dubious. Despite his marriage with Scarlet and the two share a certain fondness for each other, Valentine only appeared to be a little disturbed by her death. Finally, Valentine keeps a professional distance with his subordinates at best, only caring that they fulfill his orders, whether they die or not.

Valentine has a somewhat humorous quirk: he likes to take afternoon naps and orders everyone around him not to disturb him when he sleeps.

Youth When the President was a child, his father went to war, and never came back. One day, a soldier named Captain Valentine came to Funny's house and told him that his father was captured by the enemy. After resisting intense torture, he committed suicide in order not to betray his country. He retained a handkerchief (horrifically, behind his eye) which Captain Valentine then gave to Funny.[3]

It is implied that Funny's mother remarried with Captain Valentine some time later.

American Civil War While on an excavation, Valentine's company perished in a desert. Valentine himself, exhausted, fell onto the site of the Corpse's Heart. His life was saved due to the Corpse's power, and he inferred the existence of a complete Corpse.

At some point later, he was captured by the enemy and brutally whipped, leaving scars spanning his back (in a pattern resembling that of the flag of the United States).[32]

Steel Ball Run The Steel Ball Run race is a plot set up by Valentine and the down-on-his-luck promoter, Steven Steel, to scope through the United States to get the Saint Corpse Parts which were rumored to have life-changing power. As he hosted and monitored the event, he'd send out people of his choosing to make sure things didn't go haywire in the process while at the same time trying to find pieces of the corpse parts themselves.

By obtaining the corpse, Valentine, being a patriot, wishes to use its power to bring a better future to America by merging his stand and the corpse's power to deflect all misfortunes befalling on his country to foreign countries.

During the race, Valentine employs many assassins to kill both Gyro Zeppeli and Johnny Joestar, even having some participate in the race to get close to the duo. The majority of his subordinates are Stand users, such as Blackmore, Mike O. and Diego Brando from Another Universe.

Valentine discovers a traitor in his ranks, which he first believed to be Mountain Tim, then his wife, Scarlet, before finding the real traitor: Lucy Steel (disguised as Scarlet).

Receiving the Corpse Once learning that the Corpse parts were embedded within Lucy, he had her live with him, knowing that she was disguised as his wife, and in the hopes of taking the Corpse parts out of her when the time was right.

In Philadelphia After seeing Lucy for what she truly is, he holds her until the Corpse's power is at its fullest. He hires D-I-S-C-O to stall Gyro so he can kill Johnny himself. Using Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap, He sends both Diego Brando and Wekapipo (both have since defected from Valentine's employ) to alternate dimensions to shoot Johnny and eliminate the three at once. He fights Wekapipo and Diego with the odds in his favor, then Diego uses Scary Monsters to guide Johnny to safety and shoot Valentine. However, Valentine uses his Stand to replace his dying body.

He takes off in a train to protect Lucy from Diego and Hot Pants, while Ticket to Ride takes form. He makes several clones to fight off the two but is nearly killed by Diego. After fighting and killing Diego, Lucy's Stand takes form and powers up D4C. He quickly uses it to kill Hot Pants and prepares to fight Gyro and Johnny.

Atlantic Ocean When Gyro and Johnny finally show up to confront the president, Valentine shows the full extent of his new ability. Valentine misdirects everything that was intended to kill him to another part of the world, killing someone else. However, Gyro tells Johnny that it is time for "Lesson 5", meaning the use of the Golden Spin. As Gyro prepares for the Golden Spin, Valentine shoots him non-lethally. However, with the effects of D4C -Love Train, the wound travels up his body towards a more lethal spot. Gyro then summons Ball Breaker and passes through the dimensional barrier, accelerating the age of half of Valentine's face. As the wound travels up Gyro's body, he shoots Ball Breaker a second time, seemingly killing Valentine. However, Valentine was turned into an old man due to the second attack and after recovering, he finally manages to kill Gyro.

After killing Gyro, Johnny relentlessly tries to do anything possible to even harm Valentine, but to no avail. Valentine then shoots Johnny's horse, Slow Dancer, to eliminate the chance of seeing the Golden Rectangle. In a last-ditch effort, Johnny uses one of Gyro's steel balls to heal his horse which kicks him into the air, activating Tusk ACT 4.

Death(s) After being hit by Tusk ACT 4, he found himself subjected to the Spin, which drove him into a hole in the ground every time he jumped to another dimension. He attempted to bribe his way away from this by offering Johnny a brand new Gyro Zeppeli, whom he shot and killed prior, in return for Johnny ending the Spin. Johnny refuses, stating that even a Gyro from another dimension would not be the same Gyro as the one he had adventured with.

After an explanation of how he wanted to use the Corpse parts for his country, he mentions that Hot Pants died. However, he managed to take the spray from another dimension's Hot Pants and hands it over to Johnny so that he can heal Lucy. Johnny, though gradually trusting the president, tosses Valentine's empty pistol to his side and challenges him to pick it up, harboring a suspicion that Valentine had brought a pistol back with him from an alternate dimension to attack him with. The suspicion proved correct, and knowing that if he picked up the pistol it would merge with the one from the alternate dimension and reveal his intention to betray Johnny, he hesitated for a moment. After reaffirming his personal sense of justice, he draws his weapon and shoots Johnny, who in turn shoots back at him. The gunfight results in the final death of the president.

At the conclusion of Steel Ball Run, it is mentioned that despite Valentine's disappearance from the public eye at the end of the race, he attained approval ratings as high as 91%.