User:A Mandrell/sandbox

Is there a cure or treatment for LIFE? That is what many of us are faced with as we navigate the roads and journeys our our lives. We hit potholes and speed bumps along the way, but as we encounter these crises, should we expect to find a cure or a treatment? These developments are not limited to an occurrence at a specific time in our lives, they hit us throughout our lives. Many of us would like to just "blame it on our midlife crisis", but in this new century of high cultural standards and social media, we have a new question to ask ourselves. What is true midlife? Is it that first "uh-oh" moment? Is it when we reflect on our lives and ask "What's next?" Perhaps it is an emotional response to a multitude of stresses -- unhappy marriages, disappointment in our jobs, and financial woes. Actually, it can be all of these. Dr. Vivian Diller suggests that all of these have a cumulative effect, but many can happen at different ages and stages of our lives. She also feels that true "midlife" needs to be adjusted to a new timeline. As our lives are getting longer, and societal definitions within our culture change, we need to adjust the time line of "midlife". Dr. Diller points out that our lifespans are expanding out into our 80's and 90's, so true midlife would appear to be more early 50's, as compared to our previous notion of late 30's or early 40's. She has proposed renaming "Midlife Crisis" to "The Emerging Maturity Crisis". Her three reasons for this are below:

Longer Life Span

We have to address the shifting life expectancy. As the average life span increases from 55 - 78 to well into the 80's and 90's, we need to shift our perception of midlife from approximately age 40, as Jung originally placed it, to a more realistic age of 55 or 60. However, as our age as shifted, many of the "uh-oh" moments have not. Many psychologists place these moments at approximately the same time frame of the 40's. Also, many other signs emerge, balding, graying, wrinkles, loss of vision, and decrease in libido. We can also point to this time period as a time of "seeking out age-defying remedies". Society is also playing a role here, by pushing forth a youth and beauty obsessed culture. This affects both men and women, as both are seekers out of modern plastic surgery techniques.

Expectations Of Happiness

Recently, "finding happiness" has become a major expectation in our life's pursuit. Before, we just absorbed the frustration and dissatisfaction as part of life and pressed on. Now, however, we expect it as the result of our hard work. In our modern society of social media, we have alternatives for when frustration and dissatisfaction hit. We end our marriages, or we seek out new jobs, rather than stay in the unhappy and unfulfilling environment. We also foresee a longer life span, so we wish to be happy now, rather than live out the rest of our lives in a miserable state.

Changing Roles

The notion of family has changed recently as well. The family dynamic has changed from the clichéd idea of women staying home to tend to the children, and men working long hours and avoiding the family. There is now a more even partnership at work, in that parental duties are often shared among the mother and father. This changes the conventional idea of the man leaving his family for a younger woman, or the woman resigning her life to knitting and crotchet as the nest empties, both scenarios commonplace in the 50's or 60's. The workforce dynamic has completely reversed with women now making up the majority of the workforce, with many of them supporting the family. Men have also chosen to be stay at home dads, and becoming the major parental force in the family. These men are not looking to destroy the family by setting off on a midlife adventure without great concern for the outcome on their family unit.