User:Abcquantumle/Water privatization in Dar es Salaam/Nathan.brenn Peer Review

General info
Abcquantumle
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Abcquantumle/Water privatization in Dar es Salaam
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Water privatization in Dar es Salaam

Evaluate the drafted changes
Your additions to this section are very detailed and hold a great deal of substance. It seems you've gone live with your edits so I cannot see what it was before (without going through the edit history). I have a few suggestions and parts that seemed slightly confusing. First, "Dublin Statement 1992" should probably be "Dublin Statement of 1992" or "the 1992 Dublin Statement". The next sentence "However, pro-reformers exploited..." is a bit confusing. I know you talk about some pro-reformer action in the previous sentence but this transition is not clear. Think about writing out "International Monetary Fund" and/or linking a Wiki article in case people are not familiar with the IMF. In the phrase "argued that ' Water is life'  and 'Water Democracy', "argued" doesn't make sense with "Water Democracy" so maybe add a phrase before water democracy like "fought for" or something similar. The end of this sentence works well and opens up the article for further discussion!

Good work!