User:AbiL7/Education reform/Manorhe18 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Abigail Lomibao- AbiL7


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:AbiL7/Education_reform?preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Education reform

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

This is a very important and worthwhile contribution to the article- the tone of this paragraph does not seem very neutral/ Encylopedia-esque right now and also seems very broad- I think what would help would be to add more hard statistics and citations/ name specific zoning and de jure laws (simply by linking more Wikipedia articles too). There is a lot more historical context also that would contribute to a more neutral and informative tone. The second paragraph under the History of Racial Segregation seems great and is more along the lines of what the first paragraph should be.

It looks like you didn't finish the Reform and Reparations section yet, but this seems also very important and I am interested in seeing what comes up. I think with that section too, there can be a lot of specific and narrow citations and examples you can add. Overall, great job with your choice on content and what you decided to focus on and add to this article!