User:AdubofourGh/Language proficiency/Dalia SeifAllah Peer Review

General info

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 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
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Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

I think Isaac did an amazing job improving and revising this article. The author added a very effective lead that gives a better understanding of what is meant by language proficiency. Isaac also added important sections to the article. He initiated new discussions of how language proficiency can be beneficial, how L1, L2 and foreign language acquisition differ, what language domains control proficiency, and how language proficiency mediates discrimination. These meaningful discourses will open new avenues for other editors to improve this article and elevate its value. Besides, proficiency and discrimination added by the author fill the antiracism and unbiased discourses gap of Wikipedia. Future editing may build up on it and offer a discussion of racialized languages, such as African American Vernacular language. Although the new sections still need much work to be fully developed, which would be done by other editors, they afforded the article better and broader perspectives.

The language used in these new sections is so accessible to everyone, even to those who know nothing about language proficiency intricacies. It was easy to read the new sections and find their relation to the old ones. I think Isaac has a clear focus with no slipping moments in arguments. The language was very neutral. I also found it very effective to have other links to knowledge areas, such as code-switching and translanguaing. Alongside this relevance of language and tone, the claims have enough evidence and are well-cited.

However, I would ask Isaac to alternate the word “benefits” with another word or phrase and add one or two sentences explaining the economic effectiveness of language proficiency since this idea is not developed. One more sentence is recommended in the L1 and L2 sections to clarify how L1 assists students acquire L2. Other than that, I think Isaac provided wonderful contributions to improve this article.

Thanks, Isaac, for sharing your contribution with me. It is very impressive work.