User:Alc306/Discrimination against people with HIV/AIDS/Drh77 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Alc306 and Maeve26


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Alc306/Discrimination against people with HIV/AIDS


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Discrimination against people with HIV/AIDS

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Hi Al and Maeve! I think you made really valuable edits to the "Discrimination against people with HIV/AIDS" Wikipedia page. I definitely agree that shifting the blood donation section into the healthcare section is a logical edit.

I think the additions to the "Violence against persons living with HIV section" look great. The only thing I was wondering about is the outcome the Doe v. Department of Veteran Affairs case and whether it would be beneficial to add this in (to show what the law says about this issue).

The elaboration of facts about the pandemic also looks really good! Have you found a source for the first sentence in that section by any chance (where it says citation needed)? I think it might be helpful to add that in (for whoever wrote that sentence before you both started editing) so readers can have a reference. One thing I was additionally wondering about is whether it might be beneficial to change "nation" to "United States" in the last sentence of the first paragraph ("The Kaiser Family Foundation found that 15 of the 20 counties with the highest HIV prevalence in the nation were also ranked in the top 20 counties with the highest COVID-19 morbidity and mortality rates.") to make it clearer which country is being referenced. I was also a little confused by the wording of the last sentence in the second paragraph ("Explicit prioritizations for people living with HIV were made by some states while others used the broader of "immunocompromised state", which can include PLHIV"), but other than that this section looks great!

Overall, I think your edits strengthen the article and make it more detailed through the insightful examples you added!