User:AlyssaB22/Deafness in Egypt/Tennisplayer56 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

AlyssaB22


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Deafness in Egypt


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Language Emergence
This section looks pretty good. You say that ESL is the primary sign language of Egypt, so I was wondering if there were any other sign languages used. If ESL is the only sign language, then maybe you could put that down instead.

Significant Organizations
These two organizations are described in great detail!

For the Deaf Unit Cairo, I was a little confused about the wording when you talked about them integrating into hearing organizations, as I wasn't sure who exactly you were talking about here. I think maybe you could try to reword that to make that part more clear. Also, what kind of events do these deaf adults join in the Deaf Club? Also, a citation is missing for these last two sentences for this organization.

For the Deaf Ministries International, I would write out Neuville's full name. Besides that, everything else looks good here.

Early Hearing Detection and Intervention
This section has a lot of great information! The only thing I noticed was you put down Unified instead of Universal when talking about the UNHS program.

Language Deprivation
This section looks good to me.

Other notes
This was very well-written! Your list of sources also looks well-balanced, and the overall tone of the article remains neutral. Good job!