User:Amandamamacoyne/Lana Del Rey/Kari dooran Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Amandamamacoyne


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Editing User:Amandamamacoyne/Lana Del Rey - Wikipedia


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Lana Del Rey - Wikipedia

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hello this is Kari dooran, I recently viewed your article draft and so far it looks really good. The information you have right now is a good start, and all of your sources are reliable. I liked how you included the in text citations. There are a few things that you need to work on. To start off, please include more information on Lana Del Ray’s music singing career before she became famous. I read your cited sources and there is more information that you can add. I also noticed some spelling and grammar errors that need to be fixed. Another thing to add is a lead/introductory sentence. Having a lead will pull your reader in. Maybe give a little description of who Lana Del Ray is. Some of your audience members may not know who she is. Some may know her but may need a refresher on who she is. Overall, great work! Fixes to make:


 * Add a lead
 * Fix spelling and grammar errors in the ultraviolence, honeymoon and film work section
 * Add more information about Lana Del Ray backstory in the career beginnings section