User:Anamhye/Q fever/WiseWillowPtarmigan Peer Review

General info
Anamhye
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:Editing User:Anamhye/Q fever - Wikipedia
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Q fever - Wikipedia

Evaluate the drafted changes

 * You should delete the semicolons & the "and" after your bullet points.
 * I would separate the risk factors into different sections (geography, age, and occupation exposure). They could each be a subheading with their information underneath. This would help break up the very large chunk of text.
 * " The disease follows seasonal trends, with cases more likely to occur during the spring and early summer, when most livestock are breeding" do you have a source for this information? I would recommend adding a sentence explaining why cases are more likely to occur during breeding times - what causes that trend?
 * You say "in regards to" a few times. I would switch up your language more.
 * " Children are less likely to contract the disease, but if they do, particularly those who live in rural areas with livestock, they can experience similar symptoms as adults." this sentence is confusing to me. Could you change the wording to something like: Children are less likely to contract the disease, but most children who do live in rural areas with livestock. Symptoms experienced by children and adults are very similar. Also, if they are similar but not the same, what are the differences?
 * You can make separate headings/sections for each topic (diagnosis, treatment, prevention, etc.) This would help organize your information better and make it easier to read.
 * Overall, I think it could be a good idea to look for more statistics to back up the things you are saying.
 * Are you planning to add any images?
 * "Recent outbreaks in European countries highlight the role of urbanized goat farming, which affects immunocompromised individuals more severely" I think this sentence needs more explanation/clarification. What is the significance of urbanized goat farming? Are you saying that Q fever affects immunocompromised individuals more severely? Right now, it reads like urbanized goat farming impacts immunocompromised individuals more severely. Are there any statistics about the outbreak? When did the outbreak occur? Adding that info would make your topic/article more relevant.
 * What is chronic Q fever?
 * What is a one-health approach?