User:Andrea Mei Gaoat/Gentrification of Baltimore/Krunchynoodles Peer Review

General info
Andrea Mei Gaoat
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Andrea Mei Gaoat/Gentrification of Baltimore
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Gentrification of Baltimore

Lead
The lead of the existing article does not seem to have been updated with the new additions.

Content
The content added is relevant to the topic of Gentrification in Baltimore, but there are a few unnecessary additions. The specific information and examples are great additions but some of the more broad background information that was provided was not really necessary since parts of the existing article already cover that. The first paragraph would be good for an essay on the topic but for a Wikipedia article it reads a little more like fluff. In the conclusion paragraph there is a call to action saying that " policymakers must engage in dialogue and collaboration to ensure that the city's rich diversity and heritage are preserved and celebrated.". The purpose of an article like this should be to inform not persuade.

There is great information in this draft just make sure that your primary purpose is writing an informative Wikipedia article and not an argumentative essay.

Tone and Balance
The draft sometimes reads more like a scholarly essay rather than a Wikipedia article. Using more concise language would help the article. Also make sure when presenting viewpoints/opinions include what groups hold those views rather than just stating certain opinions as that could be taken as trying to persuade readers to a specific opinion. For example in the fourth paragraph there are claims made but the claims are never said to be held by any group.

Sources and References
The references are great and plentiful with working links and from diverse sources. They are also very up to date.

Organization
The organization is split up well into paragraphs, but it could help to split the section into two. Perhaps talking in one section about the gentrification in neighborhoods and in the other talk about shareholder's feelings and the debate around the gentrification.

Using more concise language would also help the article feel more like an article rather than an essay and be more approachable to Wikipedia users.

Images and Media
All images are well captioned although I'm not sure the ariel image of Baltimore is necessary as the existing article already includes a very similar photograph.