User:April.k0ala/Evaluate an Article

Which article are you evaluating?
Muraqqa

Why you have chosen this article to evaluate?
I chose this article because the term is noteworthy in discussions about Islamic Manuscript Art, and it was linked to the article on "Persian Miniatures" that I read earlier. The "Muraqqa" article matters because this album type represents a shift in the traditions of Islamic Manuscript Art, one that notably made these artworks more accessible than they previously were when produced as whole volumes. My preliminary impression of this article is that it provides sufficient historical context and comparative information. It also accounts for the diversity of muraqqas in different geographic and cultural locations: Persia, Turkey, and the Indian subcontinent.

Evaluate the article
The Lead Section, while highly informative, takes up a significant portion of the whole article. It could be more concise by using the following sections as areas to expand on muraqqas. For example, I argue that the first two paragraphs should remain in the lead section whereas the subsequent paragraphs could become their own section entitled "Styles and Binding." Within this new subsection, information should be organized in terms of styles of art, binding, and the role of the calligrapher (and other skilled artisans) in these organizational decisions. The final sentence about the similarity with anthologies seems like an afterthought and an awkward point of transition. I recommend removing the sentence (or otherwise better integrating it earlier on where the article explains what a muraqqa is in the lead section).

The subsections should be renamed to better reflect the historical period of muraqqas. Meaning, instead of using modern nomenclature of "Turkey" and the "Indian Subcontinent," it would be more accurate to name the sections "Persian Empire," "Ottoman Empire," "Mughal Empire." There are some statements in the content where the author wrote "probably often" or "probably always" with regards to a certain practice. Take for example the following sentence: "[S]uch works had long been produced, but now they became the main source of income for many artists, who probably often produced them speculatively with no commission, and then looked to sell them (little is known about the market for album miniatures)." If it is unclear whether artists previously produced miniatures with no commission, then it could be rephrased in a way that does not weaken this article's reliability or authority on the subject. For example, a potential rephrase for these types of sentences could be, "Though it is not known for certain that miniature painting artists used to produce these works with no commission before muraqqas, some scholars speculate that this was the case. If so, the shift to muraqqas provided a new, main source of income for many artists."

Next, turning to the "Turkey" section, it is unclear whether the Ottoman painting being referred to is specifically Ottoman miniatures or other types/media of painting. The image in this section is of a 15th century portrait that shows Italian influence. However this is not relevant to the article because the image does not appear to be a miniature or illuminated folio that would have been found in a muraqqa. Similarly, the "Indian Subcontinent" section talks a lot about portraiture in the first paragraph, but it does not relate it back to muraqqas, making the connection to the article's topic tenuous for the reader. The final section on "Use of Albums" reads as the most focused on muraqqa content; however, it talks more about the style and composition of muraqqas than their use, such as in the second paragraph about the Murad III muraqqa. Perhaps this particular paragraph would be better suited in the aforementioned "Styles and Binding" subsection. Or, as another suggestion, the subsection on "Use of Albums" could be named "Famous Albums" under which the information and historical anecdotes about famous muraqqas would be more fitting.

A critique on representation is that there is quite a lot of coverage on muraqqas and miniatures related to European styles and patrons. Given that muraqqas developed in Southwest Asia, the South Asian subcontinent, and Eurasia, I would expect less coverage on European consumption. While having the European perspective/involvement present is helpful for contextualization, it should be a side note. This can be balanced by adding more content related to information on patrons, artists, and the cultural context of Persia, the Ottoman Empire, and the Mughal Empire.

With regards to general readability in this article, the vast majority of sentences are very long (and at times run-on), making it challenging to identify the most important thought from the sentence. I suggest revising the article, identifying long sentences, and seeing where it would be organic to separate a long sentence into two or more sentences. One guiding principle to apply to this article is to ensure that sentences express cohesive ideas and only one to two statements.

While most of the sources are from the twenty-first century, only two are from the last ten years -- the most recent being published in 2012. With that said, the current sources are from reputable sources as evidenced by established publishers from universities (e.g. NYU, Harvard University Press, University of Texas Press) and institutions like the British Library. (Also, the link to reference 14 of "A lion attacking a deer, stenciled scene of découpage paper shapes" is broken. It would be helpful for other editors to weigh in on and check the source links).

Overall the article is underdeveloped, but it certainly has potential. The page needs updating and to draw from more recent advancements in the field of Islamic Book Arts from the 15th, 16th, and 17th centuries. On another note, I am curious as to why prominent scholars in Islamic Art such as David Roxburgh are included in "Further Reading," but their works are not used as references for this article. Identifying notable contemporary scholars in the field of Islamic Manuscript Arts serves as a starting point for gathering the latest academic, peer-reviewed information on muraqqas -- all the while ensuring that the histories and experiences of the local communities, patrons, and artists are centered throughout the article.