User:Artemis Kuiper

The Artemis kuiper is a rare species of troll of the Homo Genus. Artemis can be found on the Western coast of North America as well as Northern regions of Asia. Several sources have claimed sightings in South Africa, although none have been supported with photographic evidence.

Many urban names for the Artemis have sprung up in recent years. Fallen "Karzy" Ronin, the original discoverer of the Artemis commonly refered to it as Kikuichimonji, naming it after the katana he was using at the time of his discovery. However, many of Ronin's colleagues still jokingly refer to the Artemis as Ronin, suggesting that the stature of the discoverer is not too different from his discovery.

The Artemis is mainly a nocurnal animal, and many field reports have indicated that it may actually have a means of generating its own light during nightime hours. Icecap "pwnisfukr" Veiwin described the Artemis as giving off "a glowing aura...as if it were physically bound to some sort of telecommunication viewing device." Zealot "The Game" Bolero noted that the Artemis "is able to fly reasonable distances without tire," and that "the form of propulsion, if any, is still unknown." Phazon "Phag" Elite, who observed the Artemis's behavior as part of a college course assignment said that while "it is doubtful that Ronin can give off his own light," the many unintelligible utterings "may be used as some form of echolocation, not unlike a zombie searching for flesh...although it seemed that these utterences mainly were concerning my sexual preference, one cannot rule out the possibility that this creature may actually be utilizing the verbal pollution it expells."

Observation of the Artemis kuiper must be conducted carefully, as the animal is incredibly terretorial. One field assistant who escaped after his colleage was attacked by an Artemis reported that "the [Artemis] penetrated the man's body numerous times with what appeared to be...a sharp stabbing impliment." However, it was later discovered that the Artemis was actually attacking with its curved claws, thus ruling out any speculation that the Artemis might be intelligent enough to use tools. The escapee also said that after attacking, the Artemis "let out a howl...as if to prove how intellectually superior he was...I wouldn't want to get into a debate with that fellow."