User:Ashemmasmith/African-American women in the civil rights movement/MThomas45512 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(Ashemmasmith)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Ashemmasmith/African-American_women_in_the_civil_rights_movement?preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * African-American women in the civil rights movement

Evaluate the drafted changes
After reading through the article's history, the Lead has not been updated to reflect the new content added by my peer, Ashemmasmith. The Lead does include an introduction sentence that concisely and clearly describes the article's topic. The Lead also includes a brief description of the article's major sections. The Lead does include information that is not present in the article; they were able to add content to the article's lead to include more information about the roles and activism efforts of African American women during the Civil Rights Movement. The Lead, which includes new content, is still concise and not overly detailed.

The content added to the Lead is relevant to the topic. In addition, the content added to the section on "African American Women Leaders" is also relevant to the topic. Both sets of content expand their respective sections and make the arguments and purpose stronger and more developed. For instance, the new content for "African American Women Leaders" adds another layer of closure to this section and ties together the contributions of the different female leaders mentioned throughout the section. While this new content was not added to the actual article, the new content should definitely be added to the article in order to make the article stronger and more extensive as a whole. Lastly, the article addresses the Civil Rights Movement and how African American women played important and significant roles in fighting for equality and racial justice.

The intended content is neutral and there are no claims that appear to be heavily biased toward a particular position. However, I believe that the line "All of these women seized every opportunity to talk about civil rights" could be rephrased slightly. While I do not disagree with the content of this line, it could be rephrased to have a more neutral or general tone.

While there are references at the bottom of the sandbox draft, none of the intended additions have a reference attached to them. The sources do reflect the available literature on the topic and they are both from 1996. While the current sources are still relevant to the topic at hand, there are definitely more current sources that can be added to cite uncited statements. The sources are written by historically marginalized individuals. I would definitely suggest finding articles that are written after 2000 for the purposes of having articles that are more current. For instance, Rosalyn Cooperman, Melina Patterson, and Jess Rigelhaupt's article from 2016, "Teaching Race and Revolution: Doing Justice to Women's Roles in the Struggle for Civil Rights", could be added to my peer's repertoire of sources to strengthen their chosen article. While there are no links provided, I was able to copy the citations for both sources and find the associated journal articles.

The intended content is well-written and it is concise, clear, and easy to read. The intended content does not have any grammatical or spelling errors. The intended content is also well-organized and flows well within the context of the rest of its respective section.

Once this content is added to the article, I do believe that the article will be more complete. This new content is really extensive and it flows really well. In addition, the new content makes the content of each respective section more detailed and developed. One thing I would suggest to fix is making sure that the new content has no uncited statements. In addition, I would suggest finding more sources to have more outside sources to support the new content. Additionally, having additional sources can give new insight into what new content can be added to further strengthen the article.