User:Ashleyglim/Hello Kitty murder/Simonek0929 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Ashleyglim


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Ashleyglim/Hello_Kitty_murder?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Hello Kitty murder

Evaluate the drafted changes

 * First of all, your topic is extremely interesting. I never knew about this until I read your article
 * Your lead section is really straightforward and clear. It summarizes the whole murder
 * Next, I like how you divide the Murder section in the original article to multiple sections. However, I think the structure will look better if you use heading instead of sub heading(just my personal preference)
 * Including Fan Man Yee's childhood stories definitely help us understand more about her that is not included in the original article
 * One suggestion is that you can add a link to each person's name if it's available. This can help us understand more about the people that were involved in this murder
 * Nice job!!