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Scott Friedstein

Scott Friedstein is quite possibly the greatest man to ever live. Born in 1962 to an impoverished family in rural Georgia, he quickly made a name for himself as a cat food salesman. After becoming a multi-billionaire, he invested in pornography and became the first man to eat a chili dog in space. He has starred in several hollywood movies and has been awarded 89 honorary degrees from various institutions. Married to a supermodel, he has 12 kids and lives on top of a mountain.