User:Basmati235979/Evaluate an Article

Which article are you evaluating?
Joseph: King of Dreams

Why you have chosen this article to evaluate?
I chose this article because I loved this movie so much as a young girl. Joseph was inspiring to me and I had never really seen biblical retellings animated in such a way before. Joseph's story can teach us all about perseverance, morality, and the strength of faith.

Evaluate the article
I personally enjoyed this film growing up and would love to suggest a few ways to improve this article. My suggestions are as follows:

- I would like to see more comparison to the Bible as has been mentioned by other users. Joseph is an original biblical story and you noted ministers were on staff in the production of the film. However, there seems to be more comparison to its sequel, The Prince of Egypt, than its predecessor, The Holy Bible

- Having a stronger lead is definitely an improvement that needs to be made. The introduction is fairly short and lacks well-rounded explanation of the film. A simple way to do this would be to summarize your major "points" or sections and expand on a few more important ideas. (Ex. general overview of critical response, production, etc)

- Using more specific language would be more effective than referring to unnamed groups of people. This is especially noted in the section, "Critical response". For example, you write, "Many noted that the animated hieroglyph effects were similar to those from Prince, and suggested that the film stuck closer to the Bible source material than the previous film had." This statement is vague in that it lacks a footnote or source of information and "many" is an inherently vague term.

- Overuse of long quotations undermines credibility and puts your article at risk of plagiarism. Many long quotes are used throughout the article that could be paraphrased and often, they don't stand as evidence for a clear point so their relevance is unclear.