User:Batuolana/False Advertising/NEMO LEGEND Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(Batuolana)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Batuolana/False_Advertising?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * False advertising
 * False advertising

Evaluate the drafted changes
- The lead is not clear in this draft.

- However I do like the the clearness of each edit that this person is making. The part is bolded where there is a change and it is very clear. The first addition to False Advertising is good but, I am confused where this person wants to make that change in the article itself. I would recommend the lead sense it seems like some necessary background information.

- I do like how they put the section of the source used right under the actual source. The source seems very reliable and non bias.

- Awesome work on the edited new section. I like the titles of both new additional sections ethical consequences and Social media consequences. It seems very necessary to be in the article considering the abundance of social media scams and false advertising out there. I personally have been a victim of such things. Sources also look reliable for these sections and I will be interested in hearing more. Both sub headings feel like they could be very lengthy and need more sources and depth to them.

-Maybe include some media elements for the next draft like a picture of false advertising on Instagram would seem fitting.

- I like the types of deception edits. I skimmed over the actual sub heading in the article and find your edit will be a great contribution. Companies will put false information about a product to get people to be lured in but, I like how you then go into how the non obvious ways companies get people to buy in is by being deceptive. This comparison might fit will in the introduction of this sub heading.