User:Beekeepergabi/Galapagos penguin/Vanessabear Peer Review

General info
Beekeepergabi sandbox, Galapagos penguin group, Life on water group
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Beekeepergabi/Galapagos penguin
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Galapagos penguin

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead:

The lead has not been updated. The introductory sentence of the article clearly describes the topic title. The lead does not describe all the major subsections of the article, it does not mention "disease", "population", "conservation", or "climate change". The lead doesn't flow very well, it seems like each sentence is just listing unrelated facts, although I appreciate it being concise, I think a little more could be added to tie it all together and include the totality of the article, including urbanization which is yet to be included.

Content:

No content has been added yet, but the proposed changes in the sandbox look like a good outline and start in general. I feel like there's a lot of content that could be added because there's many details about a species that could fill up a whole novel, even if it's unrealistic and unnecessary for a Wikipedia page to include a novel amount of information, it's good to touch a little bit on main categories, for example "diet".

One way to relate this article to underrepresented populations or topics is by mentioning how climate change predominantly affects the southern hemisphere.

Tone and Balance:

This article is neutral and I feel like it would be difficult to make it biased given the idea that is not a controversial topic. To keep it neutral, just stick to the facts with citations, because the only way it could be biased is by unrelated information regarding Galapagos penguins.

Sources and references:

There seems to be missing a lot of in-text citations in the article itself, although the reference section has a decent selection. Specifically in your sandbox, you're doing well with the citations and references, with the abundance and variety of legitimate potential sources relating to the topic and urbanization.

Organization:

I feel like the organization of this article is the most problematic aspect of it, which is a good thing because it's an easy fix. I think the layout of the subcategories of the information is a bit random and again, like the introductory paragraph, doesn't flow well. By adding more information or reorganizing it by combination/separation/restructuring of subtopics, it would look less sloppily crafted together.

Images and Media:

No images were added and not much is wrong with the preexisting ones. I think another map photo could be added to show the relative location of the Galapagos to the world, because people may not know where it is or have trouble imagining where. Also, the photo of the penguin swimming being at the top isn't the best photo to introduce the topic with because it's hard to tell how it looks when most of it's body is submersed in the water. I thought that was a duck or seal. And the full body pictures of the penguin blend too much in with the background which makes it hard to see. I think better pictures can be added.