User:Bellamila13/Disorganized offender/Ashleyglim Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Bellamila13


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Bellamila13/Disorganized_offender?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disorganized_offender

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead: The lead for this article is very strong and also includes links and a more detailed explanation/ definition of what a disorganized offender is. I like how you gave an example of "Jack the Ripper" or "Jeffrey Dahmer" for people to get a sense of who a "disorganized offender" can be.

Content: The content was super interesting to read about. My chosen article is also about a murder case, so being able to read about the different patterns and background information about why the offender does what they do, or patterns that each have in common was super interesting.

Tone and Balance: the overall tone and balance was neutral and had no biased voice, just telling the audience about the topic.

Source and References: although some sources are outdated, there are sources that are recent and up to date as well.

Organization: The organization is so much better than the original. Adding different headers of the offender's background, habits and crime patterns, Interview techniques, and well known examples were all not given in the original, but I think is crucial to add. I loved it!

Images: No images, but maybe you can add some "examples of disorganized offenders' or even the magazine cover of one of your sources.

I really enjoyed reviewing your article! It was fun to read through each one and stay interested the whole time. LOVE IT!