User:Belleevans/Mary E. Peabody/Jt5826a Peer Review

Firstly, I am really impressed by the amount of information that you were able find, both with her advocacy and her personal life.

That being said, the tone of this article is very casual. For example, you refer to her informally as "Mary" instead of referring to her formally with her last name. Additionally, I think there are some sections that come off as narrative and could be simplified. For example: "Mary and Malcolm Peabody had two children. Their first child, Endicott Peabody, became the 62nd Governor of Massachusetts. Their second child, Marietta Peabody Tree, served as the United States delegate to the United Nations Trustee Council from 1964 to 1965." Their children both have Wiki pages so I think you should link those. There are actually numerous places where you could include links to other wiki pages including her husband (Malcolm E. Peabody). His wiki page also says they have more than two children so I think you should follow up on that. Overall, I think the writing style could be tightened up as well as fixing some grammatical and spelling errors.

The organization of your page makes it very easy to follow. I appreciate how much detail your sections have, so I think you could also make some more subheadings to organize it even further. Overall, the content is really interesting and I think you have a lot to work with, but it could be presented in a more effective way.

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Belleevans


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 * User:Belleevans/Mary E. Peabody
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

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