User:Bluup/Structures built by animals/Pixels3587 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Bluup


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Bluup/Structures_built_by_animals?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Structures built by animals

Evaluate the drafted changes
Interesting topic! There were no changes made to you lead paragraph which is suffice as it still displays the importance of topics and information to be explained. A possible suggestion would be to move the “Examples include…” sentence to the end of the lead or incorporate it elsewhere as I feel it would flow nicer; it feels like an ending, not a transition into more information.

The overall structure of sections in the article presents a clear representation of the topic and ease of flow into new sub-sections. Structurally, this article is presented well! In the first paragraph, under “Functions”, sentence “Animals primarily build habitat…” is hard to read, grammatically. A suggestion could be to change it to “Animals primarily build habitat for protection from extreme temperatures and from predation.”

Regarding the second paragraph, under “Protected Habitats”, the transition sentence could be changed; a possible suggestion could be “Among the structures created by animals to prevent predation are those of the paper wasps, Polistes chinensis antennalis.” The above are simply grammatical suggestions, taken into consideration this is not the final copy of the article.

The additional information provided by your sources adequately balanced topics that were unappreciated. Especially, the use of examples to explain the animal behaviour was a great addition!

Out of curiosity, is there another example available for “Displays”? There is only one statement, from one source, so I would suggest another to further support this idea. As well, was there any more information available for “Evolutionary consequences”? Could you relate this back to Natural Selection? Just some suggestions! Sometimes information is limited or unreliable, so I have taken that into consideration as well.

Overall, the information added aided in the development of the topic, and it maintained a neutral tone throughout the article! There is no section presumptively favoured by one source and most references used are from recent publishes. Happy editing!