User:BoVineBaconStretcher

BACON STRETCHER : Originated on Upper James of St. Hamlington on the Thames. This is an action of stretching ones bacon. The purpose of stretching one's bacon is to elasticize the meat to ensure tenderness. To complete this task, you hold the piece of bacon in both hands, and tug. If this is done incorrectly this can result in over stretched bacon and ultimately, death. Nobody wants over stretched bacon.