User:BobAllen1357/Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders/Ccsallk2022 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

BobAllen1357


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:BobAllen1357/Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders

Evaluate the drafted changes
Great work so far on your article updates! In reading the current article on Wikipedia, it's evident that there' s a lot of information missing from the article, and I think your draft contributes towards developing the article as a whole for sure. I don't think you changed the Lead, but I don't really think that it needed changing, just developing in terms of narrative. In reading the DSM-I portion of the article, it definitely lacked just an objective overview of how it worked, which you definitely provide in your draft well. The content is neutral, so good job in that aspect of Wikipedia drafting! I know from drafting my own article that can be exceptionally difficult, since we've all be trained to write critically and analytically over the years. You haven't added sourcing just yet, but I would assume they're all from a reputable source and will be properly cited when you have the time to do so. The content is well-written and free from spelling or grammatical issues. I like your inclusion of an image. From the narrative in the existing draft, I couldn't get a clear view of what DSM-I actually was. I vaguely grasped that it was a document, but I certainly wasn't expecting the image that you provided, which definitely supported my understanding of the topic as a whole. I will say, though, the document is a little hard to read and lacks a proper caption that could aid in my understanding and reading of the document. I would maybe add some examples to your narrative as well: you mention possible diagnoses, maybe add a few of these diagnoses that an average reader could pick up on to aid in their understanding of the DSM as an actual diagnostic tool. You also mentioned demographic details: which details specifically are listed and mentioned? I wonder if it would also be helpful to upload an image of a filled-out form as well, so the reader could visualize the edits psychiatrists were making to these forms as they worked towards a diagnosis.