User:Bob Dargin/sandbox

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Practice Editing Here (Nov 23rd in-class Wiki session work)

 * This is a place to practice clicking the "edit" button and practice adding references (via the citation button).
 * Chronic lymphocytic leukemia
 * Chronic lymphocytic leukemia
 * ksudbgfkusdf
 * Hello, we are a group of medical students editing this page as part of our class assignment. We have compiled a list of suggestions to improve this article and would appreciate community feedback before we proceed with these edits. Here is a list of our suggestions: We propose to insert the following content into the Introduction section: “Men vs women’s diagnosis ratio” (note: use the PMID tool to insert your reference)  After consulting with MEDMOS we propose to make the following changes to the structure of the article (order of evidence, heading name changes, remove a section, etc)  We propose to add to the introduction by adding a ratio between men and women. Our proposed sentence is as follows:  “Men are diagnosed around twice as often as women (6.8 to 3.5 ratio)”

Assignment # 3

 * Note: You will be emailing your assignment # 3 directly to your tutor, however, please paste a version here that excludes your personal information. This will allow us to support your efforts on Wikipedia prior to editing "live" in the article.
 * Assignment 3: Wikipedia Page Improvement Plan (Individual Assignment) 1.     Proposed Changes:   The Chronic lymphocytic leukemia Wikipedia page has an introductory paragraph with a sentence which states “Males are affected more often than females”. I propose adjusting the sentence to read:  “Men are diagnosed around twice as often as women (6.8 to 3.5 ratio)”.   2.     Rationale for proposed change:   I believe the wording of “more often” in the current sentence is too vague. Quantifying the ratio with up to date research will ensure an accurate understanding of the exact differences between the two groups and prevent inaccurate assumptions.  Wikipedia also advises editors to use wording which is simple and understandable. Thus, including the wording of “around twice as often” was also used to ensure an understanding for all readers remained.   3.     Area of controversy (if applicable)/Critique of the following source:  Grywalska, E., Zaborek, M., Łyczba, J., Hrynkiewicz, R., Bębnowska, D., Becht, R., Sosnowska-Pasiarska, B., Smok-Kalwat, J., Pasiarski, M., Góźdź, S., Roliński, J., & Niedźwiedzka-Rystwej, P. (2020). Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia-Induced Humoral Immunosuppression: A Systematic Review. Cells, 9(11), E2398. https://doi.org/10.3390/cells9112398  Systematic reviews may be subject to bias through their review design, locating/selecting studies, or synthesizing studies. Without going into too much detail applying the frameworks laid out in our course around systematic reviews (question, search, selection, quality and results) I found that this review was well done.   4.     Article Improvement:  Wikipedia talk page entry: **please note that others in our group received feedback and adjustments from other Wikipedia users in the talk page. I followed their recommendations and placed my proposed edit into the Queens University Student Editing Initiative under the Introduction section as follows:  Introduction section  We noticed that a sentence in the last paragraph of the introduction could be expanded upon to include more specific detail. The sentence we propose to adjust is: “Males are affected more often than females.” We propose to add to the sentence by including a ratio between men and women. Our proposed sentence is as follows: “Men are diagnosed around twice as often as women (6.8 to 3.5 ratio).” Thank you for your time.(Bob Dargin (talk) 21:50, 2 December 2020 (UTC))  7.     Grywalska, E., Zaborek, M., Łyczba, J., Hrynkiewicz, R., Bębnowska, D., Becht, R., Sosnowska-Pasiarska, B., Smok-Kalwat, J., Pasiarski, M., Góźdź, S., Roliński, J., & Niedźwiedzka-Rystwej, P. (2020). Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia-Induced Humoral Immunosuppression: A Systematic Review. Cells, 9(11), 2398. https://doi.org/10.3390/cells9112398

What to post on the talk page?

 * This will also be covered on Nov 23rd in class. Your group should use the below template to share an outline of your proposed improvements (including your new wording and citations). Article talk pages are not places to share your assignment answers. The Wikipedia community will be more interested in viewing your exact article improvement suggestions including where you plan to improve the article (which section), what wording you suggest, and the exact citation (Note: all citations must meet WP:MEDRS)
 * You will not be able to paste citations directly from your sandbox to talk pages (unless you are interested in editing/learning Wiki-code in the "source editing" mode). We suggest re-adding your citations on the talk page manually (using the cite button and populating the citation by pasting in the DOI, website, or PMID). You will have to repeat this process yet again when you edit the actual article live.
 * Talk Page Template: CARL Medical Editing Initiative/Fall 2020/Talk Page Template