User:Brandon McDade

Hello comrades there is much to discuss, I LOVE DZ's would like to start by saying no one cares about you and reading this article will not strengthen or in any way better your life. i will now continue to tell you my life story. i was a young child when a tornado hit my house taking my parents and siblings all i had was my dog sparky and a very high powered machine gun. i then shot my dog for food, i was alone and had no money i walked for days until i found vegas and proceeded in killing all jews. i then took over vegas and ran all the casinos by myself. i was two months old at the time. i was there until i was six months old when yet another tragic tornado hit all my casinos taking all my money and ending a very great line of happiness. i then walked until i was at the statue of liberty i climbed to the top and threatened to jump. i was eight months old at the time. the cop said not to but i threatened harder and harder. they finally persuaded me down but then i punched them in all their weenises. i was a drifter until the age of two when i found my beautiful wife. her name was barky vonschnauzer. we lived together for many minutes until she filed for divorce so i killed her. i then swam across the ocean to europe but discovered europe was very dirty so i swam back. i was reunited with my parents or who i thought were my parents and they killed me. the end.......but then the doctors brought me back to life and i swore vengeance upon my two murderers. i was five at the time. i rustled together a group and started a rampage across all of america...and parts of canada. first person to find them will be awarded. so for six months we ran a line across america looking for them. when we did they were hung until they could barely breathe then let down and shot. i then found a nice house nestled in the hills of mississippi. i bought a new dog and shot it. then bought another new dog and wanted to shoot it but i didnt. we lived there until i was ten. one lonely day when i was doing nothing yet another tragic tornado hit my house. my dog was killed and so was all of america i was the last human on earth and dying slowly. i was still ten when a meteor hit the earth and martians took over and i tried to make peace but they wouldnt accept. it was a large war that lasted for many moons until finally i killed every martian and took their ship. then i traveled to a parallel universe where earth was called htrae and i found a house and lived with my new dog whose name was yogi and it hated me and wished that i would just shoot it so i did but i had no idea it was a bomb dog. the shrapnel hit me hard and i flew back, all the way back to earth where i discovered the human race was repopulated and obama was president. i then tried to kill myself but was put in a psychiatric ward. i tried to escape but i kept being traquilized. i then found the true meaning to life in my dreams: treat others the way you would like to be treated. so i shot sarah palin and the government shot me. she was the best hockey mom. once again the surgeons brought me back to life. i was twelve at the time. i then settled down in a nice place in crestline california where gunfire is common and crack is more common. so i tell you good people of wikipedia do not

Please feel free to edit this page and finish my story