User:C.Comatus/Vendotaenid/Vandelay Industries Biologist Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Vandelay Industries Biologist


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:C.Comatus/Vendotaenid?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Vendotaenid

Evaluate the drafted changes
No lead in the draft for this article.

There are some grammatically challenging sentences in the content of the article. There are some spelling errors as well. I would also suggest to refer to the organism as the "organism" rather than the "fossil" even though it is found fossilized. For the history section, try to make the passage less conversationalist and more presenting information with no voice of the author. Otherwise the tone is accurate for a wiki article, it is neutral. For the sources the source used is quality, but it had already been cited in the original article. The author of this article should try to find another new source rather than the one that is listed for their draft. I realize it is difficult to find another source when the microbe is obscure and possible extinct. I like the organization of the article. I think the drafted article is going to add beneficial concepts to the original article. The drafted article also does a solid job on describing the current state of the organism being found in fossils. Overall, with some tone change and grammar errors cleaned up this draft addition would improve the wiki Vendotaenid article.