User:Cancelpornethiopia/sandbox

Cancelporethiopia

'shame' For starters, there is no question that this shaming–whether directed toward oneself or toward another person–can only make a situation worse. It’s hard to see how this kind of emotional burden can do anything but make a challenging experience…more challenging. Dr. Brene Brown, a leading researcher on shame, growth, and change, has said, “I don’t believe shame is helpful or productive. In fact, I think shame is much more likely to be the source of destructive, hurtful behavior than the solution or cure. So first let's talk about it... Don’t mistake what we’re saying, here—while we want to create a shame-free society, we don’t necessarily want to have a guilt-free society. Some behaviors are deserving of guilt. Guilt helps us grow and recognize unhealthy behaviors. Guilt is about awareness and helps us see our better selves and strive to become better people who take care of each other in better ways.

When it comes to porn, it makes sense that people naturally feel guilty about dehumanizing and objectifying others. Helping people see the ways that porn can harm their lives and their relationships isn’t about shaming them. Rather, it’s inviting them to examine if porn lines up with how they want to live and their relationship goals.

But when it comes to porn, people are sometimes not careful about this distinction between guilt and shame, and their messages toward porn consumers do slip in the direction of shaming. And no matter how well-intended these types of shaming messages are, they are not helpful or healthy. Everyone deserves love, everyone deserves connection, and everyone can make positive changes in their lives.