User:CarsonSawatzke/Olsen–Chubbuck Bison Kill Site/Chloemors Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

CarsonSawatzke


 * Link to draft you're reviewing

Nothing in Sandbox


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Olsen–Chubbuck Bison Kill Site

Overall Structure:

 * "Bison" being the first section is very confusing to me. That information is generally important, but not unique to the site. Either, this information can be sufficiently supplied by the link to the bison page, or it could be condensed into a shorter sentence and combined with maybe the butchering and consumption sections.
 * Maybe Discovery and the Excavation: Chubbuck and Olsen sections could be combined
 * The separation of Joe Ben Wheat section then the theories derived from it feels clunky. Maybe the details of the excavation could be a separate section from a (new) section for findings, especially since the excavation won nation attention

Weak spots/Questions:

 * I think the lead could be written in a more clear way, and prioritize different information (e.g. where the site is located isn't the most important or defining piece of info, and probably doesn't need to be first)
 * In the discovery section the final sentence says "performed an initial excavation." Did Olsen-Chubbuck perform the excavation, or the UofC museum?
 * After reading a bit further, I see that Chubbuck and Olsen are the ones who did the excavation. I think the organization of this information is unclear
 * The consumption section is weirdly phrased - was this math added by a wiki editor, or does it come from a source?

Good things:

 * Very neutral tone throughout
 * While the organization is confusing, the information provided about the archaeological information is pertinent and provides a clear description of the site