User:CassieSmith5/Pleistocene megafauna/Chloemors Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

CassieSmith5


 * Link to draft you're reviewing

User:CassieSmith5/Pleistocene megafauna


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Pleistocene megafauna

Evaluate the drafted changes
First off, I think your thoughts under your note are so exciting! I also found Steeves' information about the Osage tradition to be so fascinating, so I hope this article works out well for your purposes.

Notes on the Lead

 * Seems short, although with such a broad article, I'm not sure that adding anything here would be significantly applicable

Notes on North America

 * Intro sentence is weird. That is very general info to put in the just north america section (maybe this could be worked into the lead?)
 * Seem to be a lot of claims with a small number of sources/citations
 * The second and third paragraphs both contain intro sentences that say the "caused by humans and climate change" point - repetitive
 * The West/Pacific Coast section is kind of vague and only has one important point - could be clarified at least, if not also expanded

Notes on South America

 * First paragraph lists species, then the second paragraph towards the end does as well
 * Lacks the context of the North America section, making it look weak in comparison

Overall

 * Right now both NA and SA sections are brief summaries of what animals were there, and some info on how they went extinct
 * I think inclusion of how these animals are referenced in oral tradition would be a super cool addition to this article, and make it much more well rounded
 * Even links or descriptions of archaeological cites where megafauna are found could add to the regional sections of NA (or create new ones for SA)